Kelley’s cat decided Christmas was over. Chris is scared to return to Vana’diel and hates Norrath, but is strangely interested in hanging out with river hobbits in Middle Earth. Meanwhile, Phil tries to recruit everyone into his multilevel Monster Hunter scheme.
Kelley got WHAM’d and ran out of a hair salon. Chris can afford boat loads of ramen for his Path of Exile sessions now. Tam gives birth to a baby space ship. Oh, hi Mark.
Chris jumps in the party hole. Kelley power washes Biff Tannen. And Phil gets the Picross zoomies.
Chris believes rabites are full of juice. Kelley’s furry tank game bias is exposed. Robert gets to be the Snivey he always was inside. Rock flautist.
Josh enjoys the important things, like a hot springs mini-game. Kelley purchased Legos; sacrifices were made. Bethesda tells Chris it’s his fault for not enjoying Starfield. Meanwhile, we just can’t quit Kiryu.
Chris puts on his tummy control sumo pants and gets uploaded into a big booby robot girl. Kelley married a Lego elitist who won’t pirate a pirate ship. Robert stares into catfinity, and the bunny stares back.
Chris wonders if they serve tea at British rock concerts. Kelley gets smashed in the face with a chicken. Josh learns about alliance diaper gnomes. Do not google “diaper gnomes.”
Phil goes for the water bottle. Sam releases her Thirst-Sona. Matt talks about cantaloupes in panties. Kelley regrets visiting a kitty strip club. All of this and Extra Life to boot! Donate! Now!
Chris builds a house with a tiger in it. Ryan remembers that bush. And Robert has to fend off the fan boys trying to take his Nikke girls. One week till Extra Life, please help us heal kids and identify bicycles.
Josh explains that all Genesis music is bad. Robert only has sub-standards for video games. Chris arm-chair quarterbacks the Persona 3 remake. Not the ramp!
Sam wants two things, coke and nuggs. Robert hails the hypnobooty. Ryan has to go recruit more Ryans. And Chris commissions a new Sesame Street horror adventure. Guard your eyes.
Chris sets out to get justice for Hana. Kelley complains about vegan technology. Robert tells us all about the vacuum cleaner machine gun. And Ryan wonders why the “silent” princess won’t shut up.
Chris launches his new brand, Elsa coffee. Kelley’s Pokémon demand she finds a caramel apple and a teacup. Ryan apparently got left in Seattle and is still at PAX West.
Josh learns that despite Bethesda’s best efforts, Starfield is not Fallout 76. Robert learns the taste of Amiibo blood. Chris is just here to ask, “kink-why?” And Kelley is obsessed with Red XIII on a chocobo.
Chris dresses Pikachu up like a schoolboy with a camera. Josh wants his flight stick, he needs a HOTAS. Kelley wants Final Fantasy VII Rebirth to end like an episode of JoJo. Follow Solstice Warriors on their Myspace music page.
Kelley dishonors herself in Baldur’s Gate 3 and retreats to Vampire Survivors. Chris goes on the hunt for Dr. Robotminsc. Robert hits level 50 before the third scripted battle.
Kelley needs a good toilet game. Chris wonders where to hold the sword-chucks. Josh discovers the Trails series gets more anime the further it goes. And Jason wonders if Dory has ADHD. What’s his name again? Oh right, Wyl.
Kelley plays Atelier Rhianna. Chris puts his DnD characters into wrestling matches. Phil practices creepy gnome-cromancy. Someone fetch my Diablo 4 procrastination bucket.
Kelley doesn’t want to bang Gambit that bad. Chris wants foilage in games. Jason discovers a new service at the spa. And Josh tells everyone, “Go away, I’m brooding.”
Sam puts magnets on her arms. Kelley sits down to play Diablo 4 with a proper English muffin. Chris gets hit with a pie for money. And Phil has the cast roll a head-petting check.
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