The Oracle
Aged Monkey Alliance
The Oracle, Brad Lohr - January '00- 11:00 PST

Ack. There really wasn't much mail in the ol' box today. That kinda sucks. But oh well, that's how life is sometimes. Doesn't seem to happen as often as it really used to, but oh well, I guess y'all are just tired of me updating 'late'.. I'll try to get something worked out by two weeks from now so that we don't have to worry about it when I get back.

"When you get back?" Yeah. When I get back. I'll be gone this next weekend, down in Los Angeles, part of my company's corporate scheme for taking over the world. I don't know yet who'll be covering for me on Fri/Sat/Sun, but it might be miyu, or maybe an extra special guest weekender. You never know, so just stick with us, and we'll have fun. Then, 2 weeks from now, I'll be back, and still probably tired. Hah!

Some things change, others never do.

Anyhow, here we are:

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Brad Now Playing:
Asheron's Call
Yes, still. I don't think this is going to change anytime soon... Diablo 2 had the best chance, and that got pushed back to May.
Chrono Cross Answers
*** Chrono Cross Spoilers Present ***

Crono is not playable, and is only represented by a near transluscent figure of jutting red and blue polygons (well I suppose that's kind of an understatement, but I'm still not big on polygons in games). I assume, he, with his two companions, tell you a bit more about the storyline in the game and whatnot.

As for his second question, it is possible for any number of differing dimensions to be explored, but without some restraint, they'd slide right into a Sliders episode or some such. There is in fact only two dimensions the party travels to (well three or four I suppose, but only very briefly), and only time travel through some sub-quests. Also, there is still heavy speculation over Glenn's identity. While it is true he bears a striking resemblance to Frog from CT, the similarities have greatly blurred since the original sketches of Glenn came online. Even Leea, the small cave girl who not only shares skills with Ayla, but looks remarkably like her, seems to have no relation to our favorite fur-clad cave woman. I think this might be attributed to a new character designer, with some inspiration from Akira Toriyama's original group. Also, there is some speculation as to one character from CC, Alf, who is a powerful magician who uses black elements (shadow magic you could say), whom many think is Magus in another form.

I suppose for the answers to all of these questions, we'll either need to take up Japanese very fluently, or just wait patiently for the domestic release.

Whyte Tyger

There ya go. Some answers/speculations on one of the most looked-for games recently... All I wanna see is some hip-cool triple techs again. That makes the Chrono Trigger 2nd step for me.

As the subject of the email said, "FF Whiners are Weiners"
Hey Brad wow I'm really excited about the announcements of the upcoming FF's. I went to and saw all the pics and stuff. The only problem is, I bet now you're gonna get a gazillion people complaining about FF9,10, and 11. Seriously I can see that happening. All I can say is, stay strong my friend. At least FF9 is going back to FF6 style, that takes away 1/3 of the complainers. I really liked FF8, but oh well, I'm sure the next three are gonna be masterpieces. I've said enough. I think I'll go apply for an RPGamer job now.


All I seriously have to say to the people who constantly whine about EVERY SINGLE new FF game announced is just this:

If you don't like it, don't buy it.

"Oh, well it's not THAT bad".. well, guess what. When you buy it, you give your approval. Not your half-approval, subject to be edited through a complaint sent to a fan-driven site that has no direct ability to send it to Squaresoft, your full approval.

The only thing that these people are really looking at is the bottom line. "We did _____ and 2 million more copies sold. This is a good thing to do." They're in it for the money. Not the purity of soul, not for an artistic purpose above and beyond the normal mortal frame.. they make games, we buy them. It's that simple. I think it's great they're going back to cartoony characters. I liked that style. But if they weren't going to do it, I wouldn't be sitting here complaining. Four characters in a party again? GREAT! That's awesome news. The three was getting old, but it's their choice. Not ours. Our power comes from consumer ability. If nobody buys it, they won't make it (again). You say, "But what will one person not buying FF9 do to their sales?" Nothing. Granted. But if you're the only one who is not buying it because of a 'new feature' that just pisses you off, then maybe you're the only one that it bothers. If that's the case, then you had no chance to change anything anyways, and that's the breaks. Sorry.

'Chron busts out with the EQ vs AC analysis
Oh yeah... As for the AC versus EQ debate. :-) I played EQ for about eight months, with well over 1000 hours logged playing time. By far the most frustrating and least rewarding game in existence. Asheron's Call has about ten times as much depth, but EQ's graphics and environment are better. Every single town looks COMPLETELY different. (Something AC kinda lacks) Also, the people in EverQuest, while lacking in variety, are definitely much better looking than AC. In EQ, you can tell if someone's male or female. :-) But, break away the good graphics, and EQ has absolutely nothing on AC.


1000 hours? Heh, that's quite a bit. I don't think I've played a game for more than 500 hours since Starcraft... a frightening thought. Anyhow, there's coming from someone who's spent a lot of time playing both (yes I know he's played quite a bit of AC, I know him ;]) .. So if you're looking to decide between the two, there you are.

Donde esta tu hallpass?
Am I the only one excited about the class system being brought back to FF9? I mean, we can only hope that the word "OnionKid" will appear SOMEwhere!


I must admit I liked the idea of everyone being in their own class, (Rydia is a summoner/black magic user. Period) had the most appeal to me. But I love FFTactics, I love FF5, so the job system doesn't bother me at all. I'm not sure which FF9 will use, (since the 'class system' could be taken either way, I guess..) but I'm assuming you mean jobs, which wasn't bad at all. You'll definitely see me picking up FF9.

Comment Title
I'm currently playing Suikoden, and just got Freed in my party. Maybe I Should call him Freed Y instead. Y? Because For some reason Mr. Freedy has a pointless Y tacked onto the end of his name. Everyone still just calls him plain old Freed, and he doesn't seem special, but the Y is still there. Does Freed Y mean something? Is it a glitch, or maybe a freak occurrence? (which I guess would basically be a glitch) Is Freed Y really a superhero in disguise that forgot to come up with a name for his alter ego? Or maybe it's even supposed to be there? I've been wondering it for awhile, so if you know anything about it please tell me.

Joshai the Blithe

"There are many beautiful women in this world, but not many of them will bring you lasagna. Most of them just cheat on you."- Silent Bob

I have no clue why Freed Y has his Y up there. Maybe other people do. I wish I could get back to Suikoden 2 and get all the stuff I missed the first time through.. I really didn't get many of the stars... only like 80 or so. Wah. The real reason I posted this is because of the quote on the end. Silent Bob is a wise man. And that's a great line from Clerks.

This, the start of my advice column career?
Hiya, Brad!

This letter is going to sound more like what people write to Ann Landers than you, but I figure you could help me with your oracular expertise. Or early-morning caffeine rants, whichever you have in stock. You see, I have two very dear friends who are extremely obsessive about the last two Final Fantasies. We're all 21-year-old college women, so this is a little unusual. Back when I was playing FFVII, they'd go to my room and sit and watch the game as I played it for hours. It made me feel like my years-old obsession with Square was not just some wacky quirk, and everything was good.

Now, though, things are a bit more complicated. I beat FF8 and offered to play it again for one of these friends to watch. My other friend occasionally wanders by and watches it too. Since I've started playing through this game again, though, they've asked me to play the introduction and dance scene about a dozen times each. It would help if either of them was interested in picking up the controller and playing for me, but one only likes to watch the game and the other won't play it until she gets her own version. I love these scenes, but they get old time after time after time. And I think that the more game I play, the more times I'll have to replay every scene. Last week I lent my game and Playstation to another friend of mine to play for a few weeks, but... what happens when I get it back?

These friends are like sisters to me; we're probably the only group of girls in the world who gave each other FF posters for Christmas. I just don't know how to tell them to become a bit less obsessive about making me show them everything. Please help me, or kindly donate them a better computer so they can run the video clips from this site!


Anytime a group of 21 year old girls want to sit around and watch video game scenes for a long time, they can just come over to my plaa(SMACK) owww.. sorry dear :( .. er.. that is, Spencer has some room in his be(SMACK) god damn, it's a conspiracy.. maybe Edge has some spare couches they could rearrange theatre style.. (flinch.. no smack.. breathe easy).. let's see. I'd have to say that you're just going to have to let them know that you're only going to go through a particular scene X number of times, (it'd be once, for me, personally..) and that they have to appreciate it as they would a movie. If they want to see the scenes they personally like the best, then they need to go out and rent it themselves. If they just want to watch, well, it goes by once, if you miss it, that sucks. Either that, or a funny thing just crossed my mind. They can get a VCR, hook it up between the PSX and the TV, and tape you playing. Then they can go back and watch the scenes as much as they please. How 'bout that? Let me know if that all works, or if you all are going to be in California anytime (SMACK) .. (groan.. fall over.. unconcious)

... after the concussion wore off ...
Well, I bought a PSX for FFVIII. Being the guy living under the rock outside your house (Hi Oracle! I'm waving to you), I didn't learn until this Christmas that, much to my dismay, they stopped making FFT. I'm sure that probably happened a while ago, but I'm so clueless it doesn't matter. I really don't think I'll find the game at some department store, though I might just look for the hell of it, but, what I'm wondering is, is there any chance that the game may be rereleased? Didn't they do that with FFVII?

See yesterday's column about sneaky ways of picking up out of print games. Other than that, the reason they reprinted FF7 was because it made the 'Greatest Hits' setup.. which I don't think FFT is likely to do. Not that it isn't a great game, but it has to sell over a couple million copies, and FFT just didn't. I'm just glad I have my copy :)

Drugz R bad!
Booyaka(what slephie was trying to spread), brad

Is it just me or is there a strage connection between the song "blue" by eifel65 and the happy happism cult led by the BLUE carpainter in earthbound/mother 2. Mabye the singer of the song is Blue(sad) becuase of the mani mani statue. In the song he talks about all the blue people that walk aroun out side. The singer said " I have a girlfreind, she is so blue." I think he is refering to paula/skye/paige/whatever here. when he sings the chorus (the adabadidabado part) he could be talking in the the mrs saturn broken english. The more I thing about it the more I am convinced that all these plugs were intended,


Heh, is that what Selphie's trying to spread... er.. bad Brad. I think you're high on CRACK. High on crack is bad! Drugs are bad! You're a bad person for being high on crack. You're going to hell in a crackpipe! Crack Pipe of LOVE, straight to hell with you. How much for some crack?


You never actually said, is Asheron's Call any good?
-The Spiraling Shape in Your Eye

No, I hate it. :) Nah, it's a great game. I dig it. A lot of that has to do with always having Heather around to beat stuff up with, since she's playing as well. Lots of fun if you have some constant partners that you can count on to hold $10,000 and not run off with it.

hey brad you liar, i left the page open for over 281 days a while ago, and there is NO secret ending! now, i'm forced to send Culex, Mega Man, Vincent, Vile, and all the others after your lying ass.

Oh, I'm the liar? That pic hasn't been there for more than 30 or so days.. so now who's gonna catch Mega Man's super ball of mass destruction, huh?

Ugh... Strawberry ice cream is worse than... Gene Hackman in a thong! The only ice cream worth living for includes chocolate or vanilla. Get with it, Brad!

... mmmm, Gene Hackma-- ER.. ew.. Strawberry Ice cream (esp Strawberry Cheesecake Ice Cream.. ohyum) is very good. My favorite ice cream flavor of all time has to be that 3 Musketeers ice cream.. Medieval Madness.. super yummy :)

"Hacked into my email account.. I'm so sure! (..I'm like, from a really good part of Encino!)"

Do mine ears decieve me? Is that a Zappa quote? Nevermind, you probably have no idea what i'm talking about.


"...I could totally see me in like a black teddy.. oh.. 'Hurt me, hurt me! I'm so sure!'

"...and she's like, bag yer nails! I was so embarassed!"

I did what Brad said you said to kill somebody so I killed somebody and they got mad at me then they died and stuff and the cops are chasing me and stuff and I'm hiding out here and stuff and stuff so what do I do now?

Now you have to kill yourself. It's the only way out, Steve.

Words from the Wise One:

Okay, that wasn't quite as short as I originally thought it would be.. and it didn't take me too long to do. Maybe I'm just getting better. Anyhow, it's off to work AGAIN for me today.. soo.. off I go, into the wild blue yonder.. .. nevermind.

Brad "I LIKE PORK!" Lohr

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