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Pictoral Flood
Googleshng - December 1 '99- 1:30 Eastern Standard Time

Today I got a whole bunch of pictures of me. I was paticularly amused by the Star Wars spoof one. Anyway, go check those out. I have however noticed that all pictures of me have been of a rather abstract nature. That's not very fair. I mean, all the other Q&A people get bright shiny anime style pictures, but I don't. It's because they gave you pictures of themselves, isn't it. Well, I'm not about to put a picture up now while everyone's playing guess the gender, the camp that figured wrong would just thing it was a picture of someone else and jump down my throat. Anyway, since that whole issue seems to be dying down finally, here's what I'll do instead. If you feel like drawing a male picture of me and need one to go by, pretend I look like Magus from Chrono Trigger. If you feel like drawing a female picture of me and need one to go by, pretend I look like Alys from PS4, but with green hair.

Oh, for those of you who are curious, today's polls say I'm female again. I wonder if this will keep switching every day. 8)

Anyway, this column isn't about ME it's about RPG questions, and for a change, a lot of you have finally remembered that it seems, so I'm looking forward to it.


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and Miyuski

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Draw Me!
Fan Googles
In the PSX:
I didn't get to play it today!
In the Genesis:
Phantasy Star 2
I miss farmers too.
In the Gameboy:
My cousin's copy of Pokemon
That's it, I'm just going to get the money.
In the SNES:
My SNES is dusty!
In the SMS:
Phantasy Star
In the NES:
Punch Out
Gathering dust.
In the Saturn:
Wait, not nothing, there's air!
In the N64:
Smash Bros.
Nobody ever uses Yoshi...
This question really oppened my eyes
Hi oh wonderful Google,

I'm not going to inquire upon your gender in the hope that you will print this. I looked at the list of theaters where Princess Mononoke is playing, and found that none were in South Carolina (where I happen to live), so needless to say I was pretty mad. But then I noticeed that it starts showing in an Orlando theater on the 3rd. I was glad beacause my family is going to Orlando the day after Christmas. So now I have four questions. 1. Do you think it will still be playing there by then? 2.What do you think the likeleyhood(can't spell) is of a widespread release anytime soon? 3.If you don't print this, would you at least send me a reply? 4. Paper or Plastic?

Look! Up in the sky! Its a bird! Its a plane! Its a tonberry! NO! Its MALO DUENDE!!

Well, I believe the first 4 theaters showing Mononoke still have it, so it should last that long. Also, since so many otaku have been blitzing the theaters, there's a chance it will eventually get to everywhere. As for paper or plastic, I thought I was the only one who called console RPGs "plastic". Anyway, I like both. 8)

It's alive!
Google, haven't you figured it out yet? Everyone keeps talking about the changes made to Summons/GF's in the FF games, and the reason is obvious! Square is making a Frankenstien-esque monster in the basement of one of their offices! It all makes perfect sense! You have the two legs from Odin's Horse (whose name I can't remember off hand, don't hunt me down!) and two of Shiva's arms. What else would you do with it except make a monster? What other well-known characters have more than likely been used in this mad scheme? Here's a couple possibiliteis:

Final Fantasy VI:
GOGO's gender (part of which may have been given to Shiva, explaining the *Ahem*)
SETZER's face (what else would all the scars come from?)
GAU's grammar

Final Fantasy VII:
Vincent's left hand
Hojo's sanity
The other wing from the One-Winged-Angel
Jenova's head
Barret and Dyne's Hands
Dio's clothes (which may have gone to GOGO)
Rude's hair
Palmer's intelligence (which he probably traded to survive being hit by a truck!)
Cloud's personality

Final Fantasy VIII:
Fujin's eye (which may have gone to Odin, wasn't he supposed to have traded one eye for wisdom or something?)
Fujin's vocabulary
Ramuh (who is GONE and replaced with what appears to be an inflatable bird)

What could Square possibly want with all these body parts? Only time will tell, but you'll probably know it when you see it.

--The Kamaka_Z, Future Tabloid Writer

Hehehe, that's an interesting theory. I COULD correct you on a couple of mythological issues, but I'll let them slide this time.

Merchandising Merchandising!
I can't think of a suitably witty opening, so...Dear Googleshng,
I am hoping you actually asnwer this question....i asked that..uhh, guy before you, and he didnt. oh well. I was wondering: IN a section of the RPGamer site, ythere are pictures of squalls ring, an ff8 zippo lighter, amonsgt other stuff. Umm, where can this be procured? I think having squalls ring would be pretty nifty, but maybe it's just me.

Chris "Theoretically, Slepinir could have 6 legs. His father was Loki, a shapeshifter, so maybe sleipnir inherited those traits. Or maybe square just screwed up" Martin

I seem to recall that also. Well, they probably have it at Square's new online store. Check there.
Also see if they have FF8 the Flame Thrower!

You have the same name as my favorite search engine, so you HAVE to be good, Mr. Google. (
So anyway...
What do YOU think is the most important kind of antagonist in an RPG? The crazy kind (like Kefka, FF6) the generic pure-evil kind (Zeromus, FF2), the bastardly-manipulative kind (Krellian, Xenogears) or the "Let's blow up the world, 'cause I CAN." (Sephiroth, FF7). Thanks. Hope you enjoyed my little invasion into your life.

I rather like Kefka. Pure evil is a bit overdone, being rational kind of rules out destroying the world. Just give me a good old fashioned lunatic. Although, pure evil is great if well executed like in the Phantasy Star series.
Oh yeah! This reminds me! Try searching for "More evil than Satan" on the search engine named after me! 8)

Flame Retardant
Well, boycott all you want, since Sony recently announced that the U.S. price release will be $250-200, it will be the king, once again. Also, why boycott? The 2 ports are so insignificant, studies show that about 15% of all gamers only use 4 controller games in a week, and 20% only play with 3. So why waste valuable time, and space, on 2 more ports, when you can add a cable modem and play 16 people on the internet??? I like my DreamCast fine, but I can't WAIT till September 2, 2000.

Where did you find that price? I've been hearing $300-$400. Anyway, at $200 I MIGHT be tempted to pick one up far down the line. It depends on whether or not I get enough money from these strange things my boss refers to as "pay check". Still though, lately people make a LOT of 4 player games on the N64 and the DC, you'd think the PSX2 would want in on that.

FF8 Spoiler Backlash (Yes, that means big spoilers)
I have a question. How could Laguna be Squall's father if his last name is Loire and Squall's last name is Leonhart? Unless that's Raine's last name, wouldn't that be kind of strange?

-Katie, a schoolgirl who's not Japanese

Well, that would seem odd, but there's plenty of other stuff like that in FF8 alone. Like Rinoa! Shouldn't her last name be the same as her dad's?


I'm a pretty pretty girl, swimming in a sea of rose petals and yak blood.

Moral: If I ask if I can quote you, I'm making you a Quickie. >8)

Hello Miss-ter Goog
Are you a 12 year old 500 pound bearded japanese school girl named bubba?
-Ranklchick, the lactose intolerant ghoul from Europa

I don't think I am, but whatever makes you happy?

Hiya Googleshng!
What the Hell is WonderSwan?
Ami, "Boycotting PS2? I'm behind ya all the way!" AnimeGal

A couple people asked me this. It's a portable system by Bandai.

I want more kitties!

You've got'em. I have 3 out of 5 now. They other 2 still haven't come into camera range.

Gah! You've got me addicted to Slime World!~~


Good. I'll make more soon! I promise! Calling a repair shop tomorrow.

Damnit! How come you had to go letting everyone know GoogleShng's gender? I haven't even gotten to the first boss yet and you've ruined the game for me! Damn you!

Yeah! Quit spoiling!

Hey Google, I went to go blow up the evil SPECTRE building earlier today and when I did, I found out that it was a Pokemon storage building. Uh oh I'm in trouble now.

A James bond wannabe

Watch your aim from now on.

The Last Laugh:

I got such a great pile of letters today. I always have mixed feelings about that. On the one hand, I get plenty to print, and on the other hand, I get a bunch of really good ones that I don't have room to print. So to all the people that I keep passing up in such situations, I'm sorry. Keep trying, there'll be a lull sometime.

Also, remember, tomorrow you'll be treated to special guest cohost Miyuski. This is part of a somewhat cheesy gimmick the other staffers suggested to me when I first started here. Sort of a get to know the other staffers deal. Anyway, since Miyu doesn't have any real Q&A skills, I suppose I'll give you all the special treat of removing the ban on anime questions for tomorrow. Don't forget though, we have to write it tonight, so get those questions in as soon as you can. One of these days I need to get Veronica to cohost. Maybe that will help revitalize weekend Q&A.

Also, the gender debate got a bit interesting today. Many people suggested I have a Jusenkyo curse, one person suggested I was really Sharkey (Nope, I don't have enough time to run TWO funny pages, besides, I've had conversations with him in public), and one person even thought I was Andrew Vestal and every other Q&A host since the dawn of time. Most said I was a girl though, and I can almost guarrentee tomorrow it'll be male.
and now...
because it's been so long...
and Impeesa sent me such a hilarious pic...
I'm ending the column like I end my rants...
with a picture of mind blasting terror...
so here it is...

Sailor V!

Googleshng "Girl today, guy tomorrow"
A pic after my own heart that one. 8)

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