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March!
In the PSX:
Wild ARMs
I escaped AC's clutches!
In the Genesis:
Shining Force
Still need that dress
In the Gameboy:
My cousin's copy of Pokemon
DIE!
In the SNES:
Civilization
It's so primitive relatively
In the SMS:
Phantasy Star
Always.
In the NES:
A piece of paper
That's odd...
In the Saturn:
Nothing
No games yet
In the N64:
Nothing
Oh, there's Goldeneye
In the Dreamcast:
Soul Calibur
This victory strengthens the soul of... Hanpan!
Googleshng - March 1 '00- 1:30 Eastern Standard Time

It's march. That means that all the glorious TRPG treasures shall appear this month. Yay! Plus I start getting pay checks so I might be able to buy them, double yay!

Oh, and yes, I did spend the entire day playing Alpha Centauri, but I finally won a game within a single day so I got in some Wild ARMs time. Now all I have to do is try an economic victory and I can actually break it's devilish hold on me. By then I think I'll have SaGa Frontier 2 (stupid slow mail) so I'll still have my time sucked away, but at least it'll free my computer up and actually benefit you.

Anyway, this week's guest host will be Doug Hill. You know, the guy who puts up all those news stories here. Anyway, he's up to a challenge, so if you have any really hard (on topic) questions send them on over. On a much more important note, he doesn't believe that I have enough weird artistic little fans out there to provide a picture of Unicron beating up Galactus within 24 hours of asking you. Come on! Prove him wrong! The clock's ticking! 8)

Belong to nobody?

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and Doug

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FF8 Last Names
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Google,

I have a few question/comments in reguard to Final Fantasy VIII. First, Squall is supposbily the child of Laguna and Raine. Assuming this is true, Squall's last name should be Loire (following he took the last name of his father). Oviously, that is not his name; Squall's name is Leonhart. I think that Laguna wouldn't have been around when Squall was born (because when Raine died he was an orphan). So is Leonhart Raine's last name or is it just a name Squall took as a last name because he didn't have one? Also, did all the others without parents (aside from Zell), get their names from Edea or just took them on? Second, Rinoa last name is Heartilly. Her parents are Julia and General Caraway. So did Rinoa assume her mother's last name, meaning Julia's last name is Heartilly because she doesn't like her father, or is Caraway the General's first name (I would think not becasue it would sound odd and you don't use your first name in military ranks and you wouldn't name your mansion after your first name), or did Rinoa just take this name. Your thoughts?

Thanks,

-Zev Senesca

Googleshng:
I get this a lot, and I always mean to print it. Well, to put it bluntly, just forget about it. Seriously. It's not worth wasting the mental effort over. FF8 never really gets into the character's last names, except for Zell, and heck, even the characters don't know what with the whole GF induced amnesia thing. Just assume they all just made up their own last names and save yourself the headache.

I'm a sucker for these
Googz! (ha ha, i know your real gender)
I've got a bunch of these for other games, CT, Lufia, etc... Just funny stuff...

1)You know the population for the world of Ruin
2)You've been drawing your own interpretation of the characters and talking to them
3)You know what Terra means when she says "General Leo, I belive i understand what you're trying to say"
4)You start to worry about the characters social lives
5)You feel sorry for Mog because you realize he's dancing cuz he needs to go to the bathroom
6)You go to operas for the sole purpose of finding octopi in the rafters
7)You mistake Gogo for your dirty laundry
8)You let your pet eat you to see if there's a person inside
9)You realize that the acve in the Zone Eater actually makes sense! (Ceiling = digesitve system, the soldiers on the bridge = antibodies, eetc...)
10)You swear you saw Doom Gaze clinging to the side of the bus
11)Your left thumb does blitzes in your sleep
12)You're playing Mortal Kombat, and you don't understand why Rayden doesn't know "Quick"
13)You incorporate the opera scene into the school play
14)You dread finding Phoenix (you cry everytime Racheal dies)
15)You actually care about the story line with the Marandian Soldier
16)You know the price of every relic
17)Ramuh comes to you in a dream and tells you that you're the worlds last hope
18)You take money from your moms purse claiming you're "treasure hunting"
19)You put dialouge on your notees to friends during school
20)You assume every clown is trying to take over the world (you mistake them for Kefka)
21)You think the War of the Magi really happened
22)You wonder if Magitek is a secret government weapon
23)You search for the characters in the phone book
24)"Kupo" is part of your regular vocabulary
25)You actually bothered to get all of Gau's rages
Quiz
1)What is that thing on Strago's head?
a)hair b)hat c)roadkill d)that's his head?!?!
2)If Locke had the chance, would he steal the clothes of Celes?
a)no b)YES!! c)he does't steal, he "treasure hunts"
3)Kefka's closest relative is:
a)the grinch b)a school principle c)dead, Kefka's the leading suspect
4)Gogo is:
a)Baram b)Daryll c) Wilson from "Home Improvment" d)Golbez
5)Kupo means:
a)"hi" b)"I'm cold! Get me outta Narshe!" c)nothing, they just think it sounds cute d)"Where's the bathroom?" e)All of the above

Well, that's it for now, if you like it/post it, I'll give you my others (or a ~/cookie, whichever you want)
Baz!

Googleshng:
Great, thanks a lot. Now I have a picture of Locke dressed as Celes stuck in my head. That'll probably be stuck there until I actually see such a picture, but the Unicron pic has top priority you wackos. Anyway, I will now answer that quiz in invisible ink for the curious: 1) a 2) c 3) c 4) e: me 5) e There you go.

See what you've done?
Reading your column today on the 29th, I noticed a rather flaming letter and I just couldn't resist answering it =^^= Pweeeze post, i don't write in that often anymore!

But to his concern. Yes, my signature happens to be a 'cute, anthromorphic cat'. Why? Because that's what my fan drew, and kudos to him for his wonderful talent. But if you think I rhink I'm really a cat, you're screwey in the head, not me :P I am a human being, just like everyone else, who just has a feline nickname. The association happened, and I didn't care. So, it became my thing. Wow, now ain't that hard on the brain? Seriously, if you can deal with a kitty, that's unfortunate for you, not my readers.

Next, his disappointment in seeing questions only about the columnist. I personally limit these to one (maybe 2, considering how many questions I do) when I do the column, but every columnist is different. Not better, not worse. Just different. I guess some loyal followers happen to want to know the person behind the text; I'm not naive to think that being female has nothing to do with it, but hey, that topic's been beaten to death.

As for getting several questions per column about SaGa Frontier II in particular, you'll notice the day before I said I had bought it and was beginning to play it. Key words here: 'Opening a Topic'. There's only so much rehashing I can do over older games, but if I tell everyone I've got a new game I love, well, there's that many more letters I can print for the column-your column =^^=

As for my opinion, if people didn't think my opinion was important, frankly they wouldn't be asking. Hey, you may be more qualified to answer the question, the guy next door might have an answer I don't, but I'm the one bustin my butt to do this column, so I'll answer what I can. If my opinion isn't important to you, you can move on to the next question; I'm not forcing you to read it.

Now, to address this quote:
"I guess the 10 or 20 magazines written by people who get paid to do nothing but review games isn't enough; the only reliable source is a hermaphroditic slime or an anthropomorphic kitty cat."
I've already addressed the not so tactful slur on our particular characters, so I'll deal with the main issue: What is done better? Something done out of love, or something done out of duty or for money? We're not here to earn money (we get paid?), we here because we love RPGs. We take large chunks of time out of our lives to run RPGamer, and if you're going to take that for granted here's your slap across the face. WAKE UP! We do this not only for us but for the readers out there. Including you, because you've proven you're a reader by sending this letter in.

Now, as for this quote:
"In fact, most letters since Thor's demise (and possibly before, my memory's not too good)"
Now, why I haven't mentioned this before is it simply wasn't relevant enough to print in the column: I get *several* letters a day of fans who are calling me back to 'take over' the column (which I can't do guys, sorry :P), complimenting me, and, get this one: *Comparing me to the likes of Thor!*. Now, while this is written on a sarcastic note, it is true. I could forward them all but I'd probably crash your mailbox ;P~~

And if you'll go back and read my columns just one more time, you'll note I take that job very seriously. Nothing against Google, but I stopped printing the absolute garbage I got for quickies and started printing not only over 10 letters per day but *relevant* letters and *real* quickies. Why'd I do it? That's just my style, and my take on it was that was what the readers would enjoy. Oh, wow, look at that previous paragraph. Guess they did.

Now, I've done a lot of defending myself here but I'm really hoping I've covered enough to defend my fellow Q&A'ers. This is a frigging hard job, guys, and one we get no respect for sometimes :P However, it is very rewarding to see our fans write in those letters for us to continue on.

Paws

Googleshng:
Yikes. Paws seems pretty ticked off... actually, I really shouldn't have printed that especially since Brentai sent me this amusing little thing today, oh well. Let's drop the issue before people start getting really incensed. Oh, a couple more quick comments though: I would print only serious quickies except for the minor little issue that I never get them, and Paws, you aren't a Q&Aer. You just covered for Brad a few times. Don't make me put you in Wannabe Q&Aers anonymous like I had to do with poor Miyu. 8)

Let's think happy thoughts!
Hail Grimlock,
You're right, Q&A is about stupid trivia. I just haven't noticed enough lately, or maybe I just felt like writing a long rambling letter that was really rhetoric and didn't mean much of anything. Anyway, I'm not here to defend my stupid ramble. I'm writing because
A) I hate Wheelie, so I felt obligated to.
B) "I need to redeem myself." -Brentai getting an Irvine Kinneas quote wrong In other words, I need to ask a question. That question is... um... um... um... I know! Where can I find a video clip of the commercial for the Nintendo Cereal System? Oh, and if you don't think this is an RPG question, look again.

The Legend of Zelda is one of the games featured in the cereal.
The Legend of Zelda is, if not an RPG, at least covered on RPGamer.

Therefore, questions about Nintendo Cereal are okay for RPGamer.

...you know, there's gotta be an informal fallacy in that, but I don't know where.
Anyway, if you checked my site (hope you didn't), you'd know I'm willing to sell my mortal soul for this. If you find it before Satan does, of course, I'll be saved, and you'll be my slimey hero. Googleshng is good! He saves children!

Brentai the Hentai
"A laser gun? This isn't fun-" -Wheelie's last words

Googleshng:
All is forgiven (because you made a Wheelie death joke). Anyway, not all trivia is stupid, I DO address some important issues every so often, at least give me that. Anyway, as for the cereal question... well, we cover Pokémon so I guess I'm obligated to answer it. Oh, darn, this page seems to have reformatted, I thought it was on here. Still cool though: http://www2.wi.net/~rkurer/ttra.htm It has all kinds of nostalgic cartoon sound bites.

Vampire Hunter Alucard?
hey goog,
i recently saw Vampire Hunter D for the first time (i'm not really into anime, i picked it up on a friend's recommendation) and i couldn't help noticing several parallels between the character D and Alucard. i mean, the obvious is the subtle similarities in appearance (long hair, capes, etc.) and weapon of choice (sword). Also, the use of familiars (the thing on D's hand was kinda like a familiar, no?), the fact that they are both men of few words; oh yeah, and that whole half human/vampire, son of dracula thing. Anyway, i was just wondering if anyone else saw these similarities, or if i'm just obsessed with castlevania and seeing it everywhere.
-MrEvil

Googleshng:
This is actually almost on the subject of RPGs since Amano made D and we cover SotN for some odd reason. Anyway, in particular if you compare Alucard in his 8-bit incarnation (Castlevania 3) to his more recent redesign, there DOES seem to be a very Amano-like style. Pale skin, long hair, a generally girly look, cool funky clothes. So, it's not just you. 8)

Ran out of real questions
YO goog my man,

Who do you think would when in an all out death match
Rambo or Solid Snake form MGS
My friend Impeesa asked me this and well I am stumped what do you think?

The Fresh Prince of Darkness

Googleshng:
Well, Snake definately if he gets to have his cardbord boxes!

Quickies

You were wrong. When a year ends in 00, always a leap year, it is not 366 days unless it is a multple of 400. Example: 400, 800, etc. -Sofa King Cool

I had a feeling I was wrong. 8)

I wanna a to be a quickie! Come on! I'll tell all my friends to read your column and go to your web page!

That kind of bribe won't work on me DOH!

I would like to know,whats your favorite Rpg.

It's either Xenogears or Phantasy Star, I can't say which because they're both right here and I don't want to hurt their feelings. The scary part is I'm not kidding.

Wheelie? What/Who is wheelie?

Kaiser

That which should be killed in a horrific manner. Just watch The Movie.

i'm leaving the quickie column forever. will you miss me?

- hall of fame announcer, harry carey.

Eh, I can deal with it.

Ok its random quote time, try and find out where THIS one came from:

"All roads lead to Amber"

-Prince Corwin

It's from my favorite series of books of course. Want the exact book and page number when it's first said? Actually, I should probably just finish rather than check. 8)

Why oh why do you never show my letters!!?? WHY!!?? They may be weird, but...but....*runs off screaming*

_*Blameyourself*_

Because quickie selection is basically totally luck.

The Last Laugh:


People often compliment me for these pictures down here which bugs me a bit, since it's Cheshire Catalyst who's been making them for the last... quite a while. I mean, credit where it's due.

Well, I'm sleepy, someone seriously do the Unicron/Galactus thing. Also send questions for Stom, er, Doug. I hate using people's real names like that.


Googleshng "of Amber" @rpgamer.com
The Chronicles of Amber by Roger Zelazny. Read them.

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