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You all know I'm broke right?
Googleshng - January 26 '99- 1:30 Eastern Standard Time

People have been asking me for jobs all day. Jobs at RPGamer, jobs on my game, one person just really needs money and doesn't care where it's from. I guess I brought that upon myself with my jubilent rabblings. Anyway, I think the 2 job opennings are just about full here at RPGamer, and as for my game, well, I have all the staff I need. What I think I will do though either when I totally finish this game or maybe even as soon as I get back from the little vaction I've been on this month, is set up a little quasi-publisher/meeting grounds sort of thing so all the people begging me for jobs can get together and actually get things rolling. Don't bug me about it now though, I'd rather get real questions.

Oh, and tomorrow Xenochick is guest hosting. In addition to the obvious stuff like Xenogears, the FFs, Grandia, she also knows stuff about Jade Coccoon, so all 2 of you who have questions about it can finally get them answered.

Play Jade Coccoon?

Ask Google
and Xenochick

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Paws
if Paws is on staff, does this mean that her email address is 'paws@rpgamer.com'? **Ahem**, uh, theoretically speaking?
Look at that Rhapsody story on index there.

What Rhapsody story on index where?

Googleshng:
It was the top story as of my writing the column... anyway, yeah, Paws is at paws@rpgamer.com now so you can just ask/correct pronounciations dirrectly.

The subject line on this letter was priceless
Since you've gotten so many lately, here is my haiku to you, Great Googleshng...

I love you Google
I know your age and gender
So marry me please!

*bows* Thank you.
-Lord Xyyn Dragon-

Googleshng:
Ladies and gentlemen, my stalker. Why did I print this you ask? Because uh... darn it, I knew I had some profound and deep reason... I'm sure I'll remember 5 minutes after posting the column and forget the whole issue by tomorrow. 8)

Plot
Dear Kindly Goog~

[This message is important. "Print" it, let the people hear me out, and I promise a really dizzope pic of yourself in the next week. You won't be disappointed.]
Googleshng: Bribing, threatening and begging really don't help getyour letters printed, but this reminds me that I am now owed 2 people's transformers collections and a pic from this person... I need to set up a PO box. >8)
This weekend I wrote to Brad and was published on the topic of why every RPG seems to have a sorceress Ultimecia plot that comes up at the end of the game-- a save the universe plot that make the RPG truly grande in scope, but distorts the feel, tone, and weakens the game in general (or so I believe). Brad recommended pen and paper RPGs, but I don't agree.

Regardless, I thought today of why Squaresoft and some other companies don't make sequels-- the issue comes up from time to time on RPGamer.

Then I made the connection that I should have made before:

There are no sequels because they CAN'T make one. Once you've saved the universe, anything else is anticlimactic, and no one's going to believe that the universe was in peril twice in any given amount of time.

So there you have it-- the problem is bigger than just annoying Sorceress Ultimecias and Zeromuses coming up randomly in the last 5% of the game. It also means that Square and other companies who follow suit will have to continue to reinvent worlds with every release until this problem is stopped.

Don't get me wrong, a huge, sweeping plot is grande and amazing, but it gets old when overdone, and gets old more quickly when it's done poorly (which is most often the case).

Let us all reach out our hearts to the RPGmakers, urging them to make more plots like FFT and Suikoden, which know their realm and stay in it. Come on, Square, we love you! But we don't NEED to have the ability to fly all the way around your dwarfed and doomed FF worlds in an airship! Just for one game, keep us in a continent or some geographical region, and keep the plot in there as well. Then we'll be able to enjoy the characters that you took the time and effort to develop (instead of relying on cliches and crutches such as saving humanity) in another game!

Oh, how rewarding would that be.

Join me, RPGamers, whether or not you argue with Brad about dating-- reach out our hearts to those who make these games and make yourself heard!

Peace be upon your household and your generation.
===Ninja of Wind===

Googleshng:
Good point. Honestly, how many 'Save the generic fantasy world from the big evil force' plotlines do we need? For the record, between my current game and my 2 back burner games I've got 2 take over the worlds and a plot that leaves the world at large alone. 8)

Chrono!=Crono
Dear Dark Lord of All things Googly and ten trillion small bidpedial creatures,

Chrono Cross.. Why call it Chrono Cross if Crono isnt in it??? Yeah name the game after him, then Don't include him! That's like holding a party in someone's honor and not inviting them!! Pokemon, oh yeah i said i was going to mention them.. I like them alot... on toast.

from,
Bob the "other guy"

Googleshng:
The answer is simple. Chrono Trigger isn't named after Chrono. It's named after the "time egg" which, well, lets you mess with time! Crono just winds up with a name derived from the same source because most CT characters have little psuedo-hidden meanings in their names (Zeal, Magus, Prometheus, Janus, heck Ayla!). As for why Chrono Cross is called what it is, it could be that you CROSS between alternate TIME lines, or heck, maybe there's actually a huge cross in the game that has to do with time, I haven't imported it so for all I know there is! 8)

How many times must I say this?
Google:

How the hell do you say "RPGamer" anyways? I vary between "Are-Pee-Gamer" and "Are-Pee-Gee-Gamer" and occasionally "Are-Pee-Gee-Amer" but i'm really not very satisfied with any of these. What's the official pronunciation?

Thanks
MarkDash

Googleshng:
Arr Pee Gamer is the correct way. I mean, the G in RPG stands for Game in the first place, so having an extra would just be redundant. 8)

Some old jokes just can't be funny...
Q:How did the SeeD cross the road?
A:It flew the Ragnorak

That ain't funny to you?
How about this for the more sick and humorous readers:

Q:How many Elements does it take to change a lightbulb?
A:All four. Dominia to break it, Kelvena to change it, and Seraphita and Tolone to make out in their lesbian loveworld while critisizing Kelvena on how they would've done it.

-Xenochick

Googleshng:
Don't make me start quoting jokes from Raja in PS4! I'll do it!

Quickies

Why does Baal's final form look so much like a pineapple?
-Blackarachnia

He's really the Hawaiian Punch mascot indisguise?

How do the people in Star Ocean: the Second Story eat and talk? They have no mouths.

Why osmosis of course!

2 Things for ya:
1) Do we get to see any screen shots of this RPG of yours of which you speak? And would you be willing/able to compile for other platforms (Win/Linux)?
2) What the heck is MacSMAC?!?!?
- Vaevictis

I eventually plan to port it to everything, I'll post the outtake pics URL sometime, and the Mac version of Sid Meier's Alpha Centauri.

Please? Can I form the head?

OK, but then it's straight to bed!

I have advanced forward
--Claude
a.k.a Super Smash brother

... Oh, now I get it. Stupid translators, tricks are for kids!

I noticed that everytime I don't sign my name,I get posted!
X...na!

I'll put a stop to tha- DOH!

Google, if you defeat me in battle I shall allow you to date me!

-Tatewaki Kuno

Well I refuse to date people I can defeat, so nyah! 8)

The Last Laugh:


I appologize for being so silly. Tomorrow Xenochick guest hosts. Chesire Catalyst seems to be my cows factory. This is great. Actually, I got a big pile of funny pics today, I'll have to post them more often.


Googleshng "Programming" @rpgamer.com
Let's see, what else transforms? Oh, Gobots. Ick.

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