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Me Grimlock not kisser! Me Grimlock king!
Googleshng - January 24 '99- 1:30 Eastern Standard Time

The reason this is an early morning update is that, well, when I signed on to read the weekend columns, I was met with some interesting surpprises. A ton of news, pics and such for games I was looking forward to, Brad's extra long column, and the fact that Paws is on staff now. Appearently I'm RPGamer's recruiter now or something, people who come in contact with me keep getting jobs. Disturbing. Anyway, I had so much to catch up with I was too tired for a column.

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<takes out handy pocketwatch, and begins swinging it back and forth>
You will let me guest host... you WILL let me guest host...
<L> Use that as a quickie, I dare you.
But seriously, show a little appreciation for the person who did your sig pic.  <whines> Lemme guest host!
<Grins> I will give you all my  Transformers stuff if you do.
Oh, and if you do add voice acting, let me be a voice actor!!! <or else>
Susan <in annoying mode.>

For those of you who haven't figured it out, this is the person who made the picture in my signiture. Anyway, for making such a cool pic, I was planning to let you guest host anyway, just didn't have your e-mail address handy. How about... next week?

Resident Game Boy... 2!
all mighty googleshng type person,
i hear from your site that gba is as powerfull as the saturn!? is that even possible? man thats crazy, which leads me to my real question, with all the miniturization of stuff, couldnt a pocket system be made using mini disk technology? i take this as possible because we play games on cds, and listen to music on cds, and now we listen to mini-disk music, is there any rumors or has anybody thought anything about this?

P.S. please print this i love rpgamer an i wanna play with them too! dont make me pway aww by my wittle self........

Despite the disturbing PS, I printed it. 8) Anyway, I didn't read all the little specs of the new Game Boy, but I've heard it's at least 32-bit. The Saturn had 2 32-bit proccessors, but it was a nightmare for programmers to get the most from that.
Anyway, really the only real restriction on the size of a system is the stuff you stick into in. Look at the Dreamcast! It's not much bigger than an original Gameboy, plus there's the "GD-Rom" drive and a modem packed in there.
As far as a disk based hand held, well, there aren't any being made to my knowledge, but someone probably has one in the works.

Final Fantasy 8 Fun
FF8 Spoilers... why haven't you won yet?

Okay, I just saw the single most bizarre thing I've ever seen in a Final Fantasy game, and I just have to confirm I'm not completely mad. I'm on disk 2, and this happened right after the seen where everyone remembered going to the same orphanage, and before the Grandia Garden battle. I was exploring the world, and decided to see what Winhill was like. When I was almost there, I entered a combat, except there was no enemy. After a few seconds, something passed by the characters, left again, and the fight abruptly stopped. Here's the crazy part: it looked like it was a UFO abducting a cow!

I know this sounds like a joke, but it's either the truth, something else weird that I just didn't see right (it only happened once, and only for a second,) or a complete and total hallucination on my part. Did you or anyone else see this? Or am I simply mad?


Galbadia not Grandia. I'm not about to attest for your sanity, but yeah, there's a few places around the world where that happens and there's some minor little prize for finding them all. If you really care what, go find a walkthrough. RPGamer has several I believe.

An interesting point
Language warning, don't see any spoilers though

I've jsut got a few rants and raves to go on about here.

But first of all, i have to say, I don't have a girlfriend, but the girl i'm in love with is MUCH better than Brad's. Heh heh heh. She likes MAGICAL DROP! And that makes everything perfect. mwahaha

Anyway, on to the bitching.

1) Why do people complain about Squaresoft so much? In particular FF8? The ones who are going on and on about it are mostly people who haven't even bothered playing more than a few hours into the game. They btich about how much it sucks. It's just DIFFERENT. It's not FF6 or FF4. I though FF6 was way too easy, hell I killed Kefka in 2 rounds with just Celes. In fact, i went through the whole second half of the game like that! Anyway, back to the point, FF8 is just different, there's undoubtedly more feeling in it, and more character development. If you want simplistic games with the old school feel, be my guest and play FF6 and such, but don't bash FF8 just because you don't like it. It's great, different, but great. And don't even start bitching about the GFs. They look cool, and that's all that counts about them. I'd rather see a long animation sequence than spend my time holding down a button and watching my guys pummel the shit out of the enemies. I had to eventually read a book while playing FF6.

2) In touch with this, is old school/new games. Why do people complain so much about this? There's lots of new games coming out which have the old school feel. Too bad for you if they have more to them than 2 people learning spells and more complicated systems. I don't understand people like this. They complain and complain. The funniest thing is like "Squall is a fag. He's such a lame main character." No he's not. I can relate to him. There are people like that in the world, introverts, and sometimes it takes someone's love to bring them around. Hell, i'm like that. It's like all people want are these old school non-developed games where they can hold down the button and win. You probably have access to older games. Go sit in your closets and play them. I just don't get it. I don't mind those sometimes, but they aren't the BEST. It's a horrid dispute. It's almost as bad as the linear/non-linear one. Hell, go find some people and play D&D or Shadowrun if you're going to complain so much about it. Just don't PLAY the games and don't COMPLAIN about them. It kind if makes you look like an idiot, don't you think?

Anyway, I'm off to play through FF8 again because it's a good game and I like too see a game that can affect my mood.

Maybe then I'll pick up my turbo controller and have a quick run through FF6, laughing at how uninteresting the characters are.

Till' next time I feel like getting flamed by rabid old schoolers...


P.S. Don't ask why I'm writing from, it's a long painstakingly evil story. )`=

If you're like me,you probably just skimmed that at best. He makes some interesting points though. I too am bothered by people who fly off the handle comparing FF games. I personally don't get many letters on the subject, so let me just thank you all for that. Anyway, whenever a new Final Fantasy game comes out everyone starts rioting in the street. This character looks stupid, I hate these mechanics, this is the greatest game ever made, FF4 is better than FF6, and so on and so on. People don't do that with other games. Not once did I ever see a full scale riot over the differences in Phantasy Star 3 vs. Persona. They have plenty of differences to squabble over. Different character designers, different ways of cramming multiple plots and final parties into a single game, different battle systems, different music styles... nobody mentions them though. Why? Because They're totally unrelated games. If you like stuff about one, you'll play it, if you don't, you'll ignore it's existance. People don't do this with the FF games though, because they feel that they are related in some way. Sure, they're made by a lot of the same people and share common imagery, but that's it. If you like FF4, nobody's forcing you to play FF7. It's a completely unrelated game. Just ignore it if the materia system makes your skin crawl. Personally, I enjoy just about all the FF games.
Another thing, don't go calling any RPG really hard or easy. For every game you found supremely challenging, there's almost definately a whole bunch of people who beat it with their eyes closed. I mean, I beat Grandia without ever taking a point of damage, but some people find it unbelievably hard. It all goes by how you play.

Major Xenogears Spoilers

Brad really screwed up talking about Xenogears, so here's a 5 page correction.

-Half of Google's mail

I'll make this brief to make up for that last essay. Hey, didn't I tell you people I watch for Brad's mistakes? 8)
OK, here's how it goes, the quick way.

-Fei's soul is reincarnated as Lacan.
-Lacan dies, but he somehow manages to become a possessing entity. (Grahf)
-Since Lacan DID die after all, he still gets to get reincarnated, so we eventually get Fei.
-Grahf is still floating around, making deals with Miang and whatnot, eventually decides to track his old soul down.
-Grahf messes with Fei's head, resulting in Id (and let's not forget the whole Fei's mom becomes Miang business in there too).
-Fei's dad (Wiseman) gives Fei some therapy, and sends him to a happy rural village where his traumatic childhood and MPD shouldn't give him too much trouble.
-At some point that isn't really specified, Grahf, being the possessing entity he is, possesses Fei's dad. My personal guess is that this comes AFTER the nice friendly Wiseman scenes.

There you go. A nice little summary of the whole Fei/Grahf thing. If you STILL aren't satisfied, take it to because I don't want to deal with the issue anymore. 8)

Fine, I suppose I HAVE to print ONE...
Hey Google, welcome back :) I honestly hate to bring up the whole relationship razzle dazzle to hassle you with, but I feel that I should put in my 2 cents. I don't want to sound like an embittered old man, but I feel that this whole subject is something that no amount of banter will solve. If you're getting advice from RPG columns, that's the first sign that you have trouble with relationships. I will now follow up that comment with some blazing hypocrisy.
As long as RPGamers keep viewing themselves as some form of a microcosm of society, and set themselves apart, that is how they'll be viewed. I'd have to agree with Brad in the sense that a couple people from every 100 will do something. You don't see all equestrians sitting around and saying they can't talk about their horse riding. If all of you folks would just realize that it's a facet of your personality, not the sum, then maybe we wouldn't have to pretend to care about advice we get on an RPG site.

-Joshua Maciel (

OK, it seems in Brad's busy weekend this whole RPG playing girl debate broke out. I agree with this person. I don't want to touch the issue. Anything as thorny as gender equality or getting dates or whatever all these letters with girl in their title are about (I was falling asleep as I read them OK? Actually, they cover both) is the sort of thing that'll pollute my mailbox for a week or more, preventing the real questions from getting the attention they deserve. If you really care, here is my wonderful idea:
Anyone who wants to have a big public debate from now on, get an IRC program, connect to, and join #RPGamer at 11 Eastern/8 Pacific. I mean, that's what the channel was originally created for after all. Just be warned I'm trying to kill 2 birds with one stone here. The channel regulars usually have bawdy conversation around that time but since there's more of you then there are of them, you can drown them out and put some enlightening conversation back in. Besides, the whole RPGamer staff is in there fairly often. Oh, and before you ask:

The Last Laugh:

Too much of a hurry for Quickies. Just listen to these thanks to Paws, and look at this thanks to Cheshire Catalyst. Feel better now? Of course you do.

Googleshng "Hurry or we'll miss it!"
Oh, someone asked about my game... I'll deal with it tomorrow.

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