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   Metacritic - Staff Review  

A Meta Review
by Michael "Macstorm" Cunningham

Metacritic
PLATFORM
Teh Internetz
BATTLE SYSTEM
5
INTERACTION
3
ORIGINALITY
1
STORY
2
MUSIC & SOUND
1
VISUALS
2
CHALLENGE
Annoying
COMPLETION TIME
2-3 Minutes
OVERALL
1.5/5
+ Here's the short version
+ Because this is all
+ That most of you will read
- Yes, I'm talking to you
- Don't deny it now
- I know you started reading this first
Click here for scoring definitions 

   Metacritic, we deal with criticism. That's the motto of this PvP-based MMO. And honestly, the DMs do a good job at it. The problem comes from the players. They do not deal with criticism, at least not very well. And when you're playing a game that much interaction with others, you'd better have on some good armor. Let's take a look at how Metacritic stacks up.

lots o words Lots of words saying very little.

   The biggest problem with Metacritic is that the story is not very original. It's the same old stuff over and over again. All good games land in the 100 to 90 percent range and anything less than the best is in the 70 to 80 range regardless of actual quality. It's a very confusing story with little basis in reality. It's a lot like the movie "The Stepford Wives" in that conformity has its place, but opposition does not. Thankfully, it gets interesting when there is a twist to the story and a supposed "great" game is viewed as less than great by someone. That brings us to the battle system.

   Metacritic's battle system is something of legend. Much like a glitch in the Matrix, when a review hits that is not "within acceptable limits" a raid instance is spawned and the whole of "Teh Internetz" comes out in force to attack the rogue invader. Sadly, it doesn't even matter what is said in the review, it's just about the score. People take the lazy way out and just ignore any written word. This could be due to lack of reading ability, but mostly it's because of a high laziness stat. Often times legions from other raid areas are pulled in from such places as GameRankings and GameFAQs as well. When the forces of all these dungeons gather together, both sides are left with lots of carnage.

   Interaction is very simple and accessible for anyone, and therein lies the problem. There are no restrictions on noobs invading this game, so often those will very little skill will end up trying to grief high level players over and over. On one side, high level characters generally are able to crush these noobs, but the respawn rate for these pests is very high, so it's often a war of attrition that will cause even the greatest of players no end of annoyance.

wishing Place for "discussion".

   Sadly, Metacritic itself is not the problem, just the players and just the lazy and closed-minded ones at that. In the end, it's a game that's ruined by a small number of vocal complainers who ruin the game for all. While it would be nice to not have to worry about these annoying folk, it's just not to be, so for now Metacritic is brought down a few points because of this. Now just to finish this review, so that I can submit it and get flamed. I love the warmth.

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