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Illusion of Gaia - Refresh page for a fun time!

And This One Time At Band Camp

By: MISUTAH SUPARUKURU!


Review Breakdown
   Battle System
   Interface
   Music/Sound
   Originality
   Plot
   Localization
   Replay Value
   Visuals
   Difficulty
   Time to Complete

 
Overall
Criteria

Title Screen
 

so liek there;'s this ther's this one guy you know rithght? his name is like will or Jim or something rigt? it's will, no, yeah it's Will? and he plays this fruity looking floot right? this flute he whacks enemies with and it's so funny. because this one time at band camp will stuck his flute i can't you know haha i can't Say anymore, because he said he'd kill me if I said anythign, and like it was SO funny! and there's this game with will in it and it's called flute or illusion of gaia or something right? and it's so cool! because you get to meak will wkal around with teh fl00t and whack enameis with the fl00t and it's just so funny! because this one time at band camp i saw will with his flute and it r0x0rs j00!

   whEn j00 fights the enemies they falls down because teh f100t its so powerful right? he twirls it liek a baton like a CHEERleader doos in a parade and in a basketball videogame and I don't play vastkeball games I usua11y pl4y PGRs which R role player games. aNyeway if you hit a purple boutton on your puper n1ntend0 you swing his flutie and the fl00t hits the bad guys you see but when he triwls it you have to use the L R buttons to do that you can make things move to his face, liek a sttattue or sometinhng else to solve puzzles. the bad giys die lkle iun the zeldra games you jsut hit them enouf times, right? itf you get teh hits and lose life you will die, tho so be cerfeul.

Teh intErface R0XORS! teh Interface > j00! becauys this one time, i presed the Pause button. It brigns up a beootiful menu screne where you chose from what you wanna wear and the map of the dungeon. the dungEons are VERY hard like Moo, you get lost if you donnot listen to the fairy in your pocket. she tells Y ou WHow to solve some of teh puzzl0rs and she has the good advice because you get ocen suck Pirate sCurvy in the game becos Will fiedddles with that fl00t too much to drink oranje j00s, which like, is so funnny, because you know taht orange jiuuse is halp for not getting scurvy, and this one time, he drank it and it tasted good! and it' was so funny!


Silly Little Comment on Screen
Silly Little Comment on Screen  

   Music/Sound. This covers the actual game music, as well as sound effects. Generally there will be about 10-15 unqiue scores to a game. Bad music sounds bad; that's an obvious one. Good music is enjoyeable to the ear and adds another depth to the game. Music can, for some people, make or break a game. If you mute the game to listen to your fave CD, that's a bad sign ;) As aa note: This isn't just music any more, it's the little 'sching' you hear when blades cross, the popping of a gun, and the sound of an enemy kickin' the bucket. Every noise coming from the game now falls under this category.

   Originality. oh HAHahA did I forget to add the m00sic and s0uynd part? the music sux0rs. i could play it beter on my dog's teeth. his teeth sound liek a xlyophone, right? and it's so funny! if you want to find out today's date olook at teh overall rating of teh game! it's rocks so much that it doens't need an overall ratign! enix outdoos itself every game and this is one no exception. it is very original liek the final fantasy pystic quests and diablo II except my fumb and thingers thell off from cliking the mouse button so much, but it's okey becos I got an operation to put them back on and tehy work FINE again!!!!! and it's so funny because this one time in fronntt of the TV, i wos playing Illusion of Flute and Pause <- pause is tah review person here and soo is SUV. Pause and SUV are 2 cool ppls that do this reviews columns! they r0x0rs!

   All I see are porcupines. EVERYWHERE. When does the madness stop? WHEN DOES IT END? My roommates of yonder yore are yondering over yore, from last of years, incessantly killing poor porcupined spinies! WHEN WILL THE MADNESS STOP!? Diablo the lord of destruction is OUT there for the taking, and there they sit, WHACKING PORCUPINES AND LITTLE BLUE IMPS! I am greatly appalled and think you all should check up on your glandular status before claiming Homer has a glandular problem. Buy Secret of Evermore.</old_spoof_review_mode>

   Localization. JE NE PARLE PAS FRANCAIS! WATASHI WA NIHONGO O HANASHIMASEN!!! YO NO HABLAS ESPANOL! And such. AND WO MAY JANG GUO IE! ... and such. At band camp I like forgot my languages, right? and NEIN! or such and rather. Will speks good engrish but tha problems is that it's not a fun script! they justs talk about the SCURVEY and tha lacking of orange juice when they walk with the girls in the gema. It's not verrry exciting, teh script, but it' doos be adequate. jsut dnot' expect Shakespeer. He's dreamy..


Cutesy or Realistic Name
Cutesy or Realistic Name  

   Replay Value. Would you play this? NO! Again and again and once more just for kicks? OF CUORSE ! IF Tihis means I get to KICK the game itself! YES! Did you hate it so much you traded it away? Here'sI almos give it to Will, but he didn't want teh game he said, he was embarrased to be in it, because this one time at band camp, he ate the cartridge and it give him st0mach 4ches. Poor will. where your experience with the game comes strongly into effect. This is one place any extreme rating needs to be really backed up. I'll give you EXTREEEM! TONY HAWK IS EXTREME! I RATHER REPLAY TONY HORN PRO SKATEBOARD THAN THIS game but i still miss it :(

ABOut TO the only GOOD tihng about this gmae is that you can see Will twirling the fl00t around and hitting people with it. :( the bad guys suck when they get draw. and the girls in the game don't l00k liek girls! they look like super deformded sprirtes!~ ... ... <_<; ... >_>; oh you meen they're SUPP0SED to be sprirtes? my bad... I'm s0rriez! LOL! but the graflicks are still bad. do'nt espect Pikachu. i mean picAsso.

how hard be this game? it depends on waht the reating is when you read dis review. refresh teh page and see how hard it is. it may be easy in a coople of sceconds so try it again! i swear! this IS DINAMIC WEB DESIGN ! TEH WEV OF TEH F00T00RE! I AM A DINAMIC WEV DESIGNER because this one time, will threw his flute in my ear, and it hurt and I ended up in the hostpital! and they gave me jello and I got to watch TV and play will in Illusion of Gaia Hospital all day! and it was SOOOO funny!


You know the deal-title it.
Click to read secrete message!.  

Concluding thoughts? My apologies to:

  • Jason Biggs
  • Alyson Hannigan
  • Sean William Scott
  • All those H4X0Rs out there ::snicker::
  • The entire cast of American Pie and American Pie 2. Except Chris Klein. Him and his big fat forehead can be Bosley.
  • The wonderful folks at Quintet and Enix.
  • You, for putting you through this.
  • Will's flute.
  • Refresh the page at least three times or I swear I'll email you a picture of Will when he's drunk.
  • "Pause" and "SUV". Of course I know your real online handles, silly!





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