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Read These Very Carefully
June 19, 2007

Matt Demers - 17:23 EST

IT SEEMS LIKE IT'S been forever since I last did one of these columns, but it was only Friday. Busy weekend, I suppose.

I'm hoping that this week will be just SWELL, and with a glance at the enormous number of letters in my inbox, I think we're off to a pretty good start.

Tonight, as I was trying to concentrate on a bit of Lunar Knights fun, I was kept irritatingly distracted by a swarm of bees that seemed to be flailing about wildly just outside my window. Those little bastards had better not be building a nest. Perhaps they just wanted to get in on the hot DS action.

No delaying it... the new week begins with this lovely letter:

Finger language.

Never played Radiata Stories, so I don't have much in annoying controller setups. One thing that does annoy me is that in some games X is select and O is cancel, then I play one where O is select and X is cancel. I don't care for one over the other, I just hate having to switch. *hammers X button* Why did the menu dissapear?

On the other hand, Triangle should ALWAYS be menu. Always.



Yes, the X/O thing is extremely GIYAHGAGUBAH-inducing, especially when you're playing one game of each at the same time. Have you ever tried to start a game and cancel out to the opening screen twice because you keep stupidly hitting the wrong button? Oh yes, I have (and yes, twice... it takes awhile for the ol' wheels to start cranking the right way sometimes).

And yes. Triangle = Menu, end of story. Sorry, Final Fantasy VIII... you tried.

A NEW gigaletter writer? Ack!

Hey Matt,

This is my first time writing in, but I've been reading your column off and on (mostly on) for months now and coming to the site for years.


Great! Or "good stuff" as my Grade 2 teacher used to say. I'm glad to hear from you, and on behalf of RPGamer, I'd like to express my gratitude for your years of loyalty. *bows*

Formalities aside, what's up?

Anyway, on to what I have to say: First of all, the guy who wrote in Wednesday's column about not wanting to buy a DS must either not be a very big RPG fan, or is a closed-minded Sony fanboy, or simply isn't thinking very clearly. First of all, there's FFIII, and several other excellent RPGs already out (most of which I admittedly haven't tried, but I've heard from trusted sources that most are at least worth checking out). Then there's all the games coming up, with FF Tactics A2 (hope they change that name), DQIX and FFXII: Revenant Wings, just to name a few. And then there's the wonderful GBA backwards compatibility. FFI&II (soon to also be available on DS, although not packaged together to my knowledge), FFIV, FFV, FFVI, Zelda: A Link to the Past, Zelda: Minish Cap, FF Tactics Advance, Breath of Fire I and II, Golden Sun I and II, and probably countless others that I'm forgetting. So many great games (including three of my all-time favorites) in that group. Now, admittedly, it's not as big a draw if you already have a GBA, but I defy anyone to say that the GBA games don't simply look better on the DS screen (especially a DS Lite). Besides, I'd be willing to bet gil that that person (a self-professed "playstation owner") doesn't have a GBA, or any Nintendo system. I could be wrong, though. Or I suppose it's just slightly possible that none of the games I mentioned interest him other than FFIII and DQIX...but I doubt it. Me? I'm not looking forward to plunking down a chunk of change to get a PSP, but for a game I really love or really, really want to play (see: FF Tactics: The Lion's War, the port of another all-time favorite), it's really not a big deal at all.


Ah yes. The newest Final Fantasy Tactics game kind of makes me smirk, because it sounds like it's trying to turn an uncool name into a supacool-acronymed-sequel. It doesn't even make sense though, because the addendum of "Advance" in the previous game was exactly because of the platform it was released on. Why keep that "A" kicking around? Well, of course; because then people could play "EFF EFF TEE AY TWO" which sounds way more awesomer, duuude.

Also, just for the record, Final Fantasy I and II are indeed being released separately, in a divergence from the past. However, those games aren't coming out for the DS; they're coming out for the PSP, and soon, too.

Anyway, I haven't checked, but I never heard back from Sony guy, so his opinion hasn't been terribly well-defended. This is the stuff that fanboys are made of. (Just like little boys are made of frogs, snails, and puppy dogs' tails, while little girls are made of sugar, spice and all things nice... or so the nursery rhyme goes. I tend to think that many boys 'n' girls these days are made of other things, but that's a topic for another column.)

On Dragon Quest remakes: Back when the PSX remake of DQIV was announced, I was giddy. Mind you, I've never played any of the DQ games extensively. All I've played were a little bit of I, a little of II, and a few hours of VII (need to get back to that one). But I've always heard that IV was probably the best of the bunch and possibly one of the greatest RPGs ever, so I was anxious to finally get a chance to play it (I got into RPGs way too late to find a copy of the NES game, and I don't much care for playing console games on an emulator on my computer; it ruins the feel for me). So needless to say, I was very disappointed when Enix decided not to bring it over. If they were to port that remake to either PSP or DS, I would be absolutely ecstatic (and DQ V and VI would be quite welcome as well) to finally get the chance to play it legitimately.


If you've been reading, you KNOW how excited I'd be if such an announcement were made. I think that there's a chance, too, especially if games like Dragon Quest: Joker and Dragon Quest IX do really well over here. I think the series has decent potential for growth here, because really, they're awesome.

Other RPGs I'd like to see? Above all others, Chrono Trigger, Secret of Mana and Seiken Densetsu 3. The first two are other games I consider among my all-time favorites (I've got a list of 10 RPGs to which I give that designation), and the third is one of the few games that I've played extensively on an emulator. I'd prefer to play it legitimately.


Me too. There's a certain something that gets severely lost in translation when you try to map controller buttons to the keyboard, and it's really not my cup of tea either.

I'd say that Seiken Densetsu 3 would have a chance if the people in charge of the series weren't so hell-bent on slamming the poor Mana series into the ground repeatedly before peeing on and setting fire to it respectively. *sigh*

However, there are a few favorite games I'd rather remain on their original platform. Xenogears, for one, since I'd be a little wary of how Square Enix might tone down a remake, and also because a story that grand I don't think is very conducive to anything but a long, dedicated play session rather than short snippets of playing time. Are there any games you'd rather not see companies try to bring to a portable system?


That's hard to say. I feel so backwards when I reply to people on this subject sometimes, because I tend to spend hours at a time playing my DS, and it sounds like that really isn't the norm.

So, for me, I can't really think of many games that I wouldn't want in handheld form. Most worrisome though, is the idea that some ports of games might be from games requiring extensive or more complex control schemes, using a controller of buttons o' plenty. I really don't like it when control schemes are simplified and mashed into fewer buttons just because of the limitations of the system. Take, for example, Super Mario 64 DS. I know it was an early game, but... not well done, Nintendo, sorry.

Anyway, sorry I can't answer the question better for you. My gaming addiction would have me excited at the prospect of just about any old favourite game released in handheld form, even though in my heart, I truly hope that the emphasis will always remain on new, original material rather than the refurbished, redone, rereleased, remade games of yesterday.

Finally, I think gameplay and story are both important. If I really love the gameplay of a game but don't care for its story too much (for example, FFX...story was way too much of a downer but the gameplay is up there with the best, in my opinion, and I have similar feelings about its sequel, as one of the few who enjoyed FFX-2), I can still enjoy a game. Same goes for the opposite: The gameplay of the Xenosaga series (or even Xenogears, for that matter) isn't the greatest, but the story's definitely good enough to keep me going on it (I recently started a full series playthrough, and I'm almost done with Episode I, the only one I've played all the way through before). When push comes to shove, however, I'll take a great story over great gameplay any day. Otherwise, what's the point of such a story-intensive genre if not to have a good, um, story?

Anyway, that's about all I have to say for now.

Jarod Daily


Well, possibly! I'd counter that by saying "What's the point of calling it a 'game' if the RPG is no fun to play?" Perhaps part of the fun comes from the actual story. I love a great story, too, don't get me wrong; I just really love the RPGs out there with fantastic battle systems, great opportunities for strategy, and mind-buzzing challenge. I'm a brainy geek, so I need to get my thinkerous fix from the games I play! Of course, the best RPGs in my mind are the ones that match interesting gameplay with interesting stories, and I think most people will agree with me on this one. This combination is exactly why series like Final Fantasy have risen so high over the years.

P.S.: Oh, and best class? Well, I've always been kinda partial to Ninjas, Geomancers (at least the FFT version), Dragoons, Time Mages and Blue Mages, but really for me it's Red Mage all the way. I love the whole Jack-of-all-trades aspect of that class, plus I think it's a great character design.


Me too! Final Fantasy's Red Mages look awesome, feathers-in-their-caps and all. I'm kind of sad that throughout the years, we haven't really had any red mages as fixed-class characters. The Red Mage class is available in games like FF1, 3, and 5, where you get to pick... but in games like Final Fantasy IV and IX, Red Mages have been nowhere to be seen (well, except for an NPC on a street in Alexandria, I think. Or was it Lindblum?)

Thanks much for your letter! I quite a bit appreciate it, and here's hoping that you'll write again sometime soon.

Correctly Guessed! Grand Prize: $0,000 dollars!

Hey Matt!

Please tell me that the Spinner is the useless Zelda item that you referred to a while back. If there is something sillier than X-Games Link, I'm going to go Wii with my controller and start swinging it at things.



Yup, that's the one. It entertained me for about thirty-four seconds before I realized just how useless it was for general use. If it wouldn't sputter out of power after five seconds, serving as a quick method of travel o'er hill and dale, I'd think differently. Ho hum.


Hi Matt!

Since I haven't written in a while, let me stay on topic.

1. Odin Sphere? Beautiful character art. Repetitive backgrounds. Crappy battle system. Played it for 30 minutes, and then moved on to Dawn of Mana. Oh, wait, that's crap too ^_^


There's strike one and strike two. Some people say that things come in threes; let's hope that the next game you pick up isn't a stinker as well.

2. My favourite RPG class... Well, I'm sticking to PC RPGs on this one. Since I played Dungeons & Dragons for so long I tend to choose a paladin whenever possible. But not the FF one, I mean the one from any of the D&D games. Better yet with prestige classes!


Eh, I don't really know the difference, really. Aren't all Paladins essentially Knights that are good? I loved the little bit of D&D that I played, back before World of Warcraft consumed the souls of my D&D buddies, but I still don't know a whole lot about the details.

3. I really have no opinion on the DS (or PSP) so far; handheld consoles have actually a rather small market share here in Brazil. I remember the most succesful ones here were the original (B&W) GameBoy and the Sega GameGear (being able to see TV in a handheld? How cool was that?!)


Could it really? I had a couple of friends who owned a Game Gear. In fact, that's the only system that I've ever played a Sonic game on (and I played it for about five minutes, probably thirteen years ago).

I have to say that I'm a bit surprised that the newer handhelds haven't made much headway in South America. The Game Boy Advance had what I thought was universal appeal (over 70 million of the systems were sold, I think!) and the DS is well on its way to selling at least as many. Even the "loser" of the two big handhelds, currently the PSP, has only sold something like 25 million systems worldwide. So, it's hard to imagine that there are places where handhelds just don't sell well.

4. Just look at topic #1. Hahaha... Actually, I think it's frustating whenever a game makes you enter a screen every 2 seconds to choose a healing item. Many games fit in this category. Rogue Galaxy just comes to my mind.


Ahh... yeah, especially in an Action-RPG setting. It's hard to get into the groove of a fast-paced, fun battle system when you have to bring things to a screeching halt every few minutes in order to perform common actions.

5. I just had an interesting experience this weekend... I was going to visit my parents, so I had to catch a flight after work. Well, my plane was just 10 (TEN) hours late, which I spent playing Dogz on my cell phone. Man, I wish I had ANY RPG to play! I mean really ANYTHING. After the 6th hour, I was already going insane, having cleaned my virtual dog's poo so many times....


I never understood the whole virtual pet thing, from Tamagotchis back in the 1990s to games like Dogz or Nintendogs today. Really and truly, I can't think of many bigger wasters-of-time. What do you achieve, too? It's not like you can ever beat the games; it's not like you're breeding some top battle dog so that you can prevent some evil final boss from taking over the world. You can't take hold dogfights with friends online after spending time bringing up a ruthless mutt, and besides, I'm sure that the animal rights activists out there would turn purple if they found a game like that. No, you're just... feeding it and petting it, and exactly, cleaning up virtual poo.

Six hours of that? Man, no wonder you're insane. Perhaps those handheld games are a good idea for you after all...

Since I'm going to start writing more often (have to make that AEG worth it!), I'm also posting some interesting things on a daily basis. So Alael's interesting link of the day is here: This must not be new to most of you, but it's always funny to see the movie version of 8-bit theather! If you haven't seen this yet, what are you waiting for???

See you tomorrow!


Nope, it's not new to me! But, if you've never seen 8-bit theater before, then you owe it to yourself to take a look at the link. I personally like the still comics a lot better than the movie, but that's just my opinion.

Thanks for the letter! Sorry it took a week to get around to it, but that's the way it is.

Summer gaming.


hi, this is my first time writing a letter to you (I've been reading your column for some time now).


Wow, lots of first-timers today. Again, sorry it's taken me a good week or more to get back to you; it's just that the inbox has been a busy place lately.

I'm having a bit of a problem and hope that maybe you can help me out. Now that it's summer, and I have little to nothing to do, I need a good, solid RPG to play. I've played through the Xenosaga series (though I didn't particularly care for II), Breath of Fire series, Final Fantasy series (except V...and I've barely played through I - III), etc.


Mmmk. Mm-hmm. *adjusts eyeglasses*

In the past two years, I discovered the Atelier Iris series, but to be honest, I only thought they were good RPGs as opposed to great RPGs (I'm yet to play the third game, but wondering if it's any good).


Yeees, yeeeees. I agree. Atelier Iris, the original, was hardly anything to write home about, I feel. Apparently the second one was better than the first, but I didn't bother to find out for myself.

Is it just me, or have RPGs in general gone from 'great' to 'good' in the past few years? One good example would be Final Fantasy XII (I know, big arguments concerning this one). I liked the gameplay, but of course I'm one of those types who won't particularly like an RPG with a slow, almost shallow plot and little to no character development. I was really expecting the game to a great part of the series (with the massive delays), but it really just seems to be a love-it-or-hate-it game.


It's a tough thing. I have to agree that Final Fantasy XII could have done many things a lot better, especially given the nearly excessive development time. I wasn't terribly enchanted by the story OR the gameplay, personally, but I still found the whole package to be fairly impressive, somehow. You're right, though... FFXII is a divisive game, and while many people love it, there are others who really, really don't.

Sorry, didn't mean to get off topic there.

So if you could help me out I would greatly appreciate it.

Thanks for your time!



This is tough, Patrick, and only because there are SO many games out there to potentially recommend. A few ideas for you:

Dragon Quest VIII. It doesn't have the most epic story by any means, but the story that is there is tied up in a wonderful ribbon. It might take a bit to get into it, but it's my favourite PS2 game, hands down, and many other people would heartily recommend it to you.

Odin Sphere. Another PS2 game that was just recently released, I haven't heard much bad about this game. A few people have written in to tell me that the battle system isn't that great, but a lot more believe that this is a fantastic game all-around. The challenge level is really high, from the sounds of it, so be forewarned!

Lunar Knights. I don't know if you have a DS or not, but the game is a little bit refreshing, and quite a bit different from almost every other RPG I've ever played. It's pretty fun so far, and I'm not usually a fan of Action RPGs.

Valkyrie Profile Games. I've heard that these have a neat story with fun and unique battle systems. If you have a PSP, get Lenneth first, since it's the first of the series. Otherwise, Valkyrie Profile 2: Silmeria was released last fall for the PS2, so you might want to give that a try!

Of course, since I'm a hopeless Dragon Quest lover, I'm hoping that you'll choose DQVIII, but whatever your choice is, I hope you have fun with it. Get back to me and let me know of your decision!

Summer gaming.

Hey Matt,

I seriously laughed when I read about how you and your family often imitate various RPG elements, which also made me remember one I do on occasion. For instance, if someone usually does something that annoys me (like my little brother yawning too loud), when he actually yawns quietly for once, I'll respond with a 'Well done, _insert name_, you have gained 10 experience points! 90 more to next level up!'

Ahahaha! Yes, we do have an experience point system as well. See, we live on a vegetable farm at home, and so oftentimes, at this time of the year, my dad will randomly poke his head inside and yell for one of the boys (myself or my brother) to give him a hand with something usually involving superhuman lifting. When the chosen one comes in after accomplishing the random task, the other's response is often to go "Matt gained 7,560 Exp. Point(s)!" saying "bracket-ess-bracket" to emphasize the end part.

Ahh, geeky families are the best.

Do you have any obscure old-school RPGs you'd love to see on the Virtual Console? One I'm still hoping to see (probably in vain though), is Capcom's videogame rendition of Willow for the NES. I loved that game back in the day when I didn't even know what an RPG was. As far as the game went, it seems like it took some original Zelda elements (like, travelling four different directions on the screen and real-time battles). Graphically and musically, Willow blew Zelda out of the water, as well as it being quite long with a lot of side-quests. But what blew me away about the game most of all was the little intricacies of the game that was basically unheard of in really early RPGs. For instance, you can find 12-15 (maybe even more) different swords to use throughout the game, some with special traits (like, a sword that can damage specters and ghosts when regular swords would just swing right though them). When you first gain a new, powerful sword, it's obvious that you wouldn't fight like a master with it right away, so when you equip it, Willow swings it very slowly. As you gain levels, the time it takes to swing the sword gets faster and faster, indicating that Willow is becoming more adept with the new sword. Of course, if you're fighting a powerful enemy where you need a fast sword right away, you can always switch to one of your faster, weaker ones. So the game encourages you to use swords as you get them, but also is forgiving in situations where the slowness of the weapon could be fatal.

Overall, I thought it was an incredible game, and I really want to see it come out. I would buy it in the blink of an eye. I wonder if Capcom has anything like a forum or something where you can request VC games...



I don't know if there is such a forum! I'm sure that there are plenty of fan-made ones with that in mind, though.

First of all, I just wanted to comment on this Willow game. I've never even heard of it before, but from the sounds of it, it was really ahead of its time. It's amazing how many games can pass you by when you're an oblivious 10-year-old and the market is dominated by a single company with hundreds of games released for one system.

Are there any obscure games that I'd like to see? Sure. I'd be really, really excited if the NES prequel to Earthbound, Mother 1, were brought over and put on the Virtual Console. I think it's a huge pipe dream, though, and probably less likely than Willow for a couple of reasons. First, the game hasn't even been translated in the past, and second, Nintendo seems to despise Mother fans, for some peculiar reason. Very sad.

That's my wish, at any rate.

Prettay, prettay cool.

Perhaps a little story will delineate my constant non-RPG music in the opening paragraph. Four years ago, Britney Spears put out a song called 'Toxic.' You've heard it, don't deny. When I first heard that song, I despised it. I thought the strange synthesizer sound was akin to a cat being skinned. I subsequently heard the song very often, thanks to all too many people in the surrounding dorm playing it and radio playing it and MTV playing it (on my breaks at work with a TV in the lounge, damnit!). I had to make a choice: I could either keep hating and eventually start a killing spree, or I could learn to like. I chose to try liking the song, and now have a mild respect for it actually sounding different from all the pop Crap on the charts in recent years.

....That really wasn't the parable I had hoped. Crud.


And because of you, I can no longer say that this column is 100% Britney-free. What have you done to the place?!

Actually, I have heard the song before. It drains my HP away in greater and greater amounts as the minutes go by, too.

Anyway, lately I've been playing Super Robot Taisen on breaks. This is like a robot version of Fire Emblem, so you would dig it. There is a LOT of potential customization I've seen so far though; enhance pilot skills, enhance the robot's statistics, enhance the weapon statistics, change the weapons around, get different pilots to support each other - and the plot is very dense.

Matt any good cheesecake. Sounds like some robot-filled fun. Truly, if it really was Fire Emblemesque, I probably would enjoy it, though Fire Emblem in a futuristic setting would be weird, weird, weird!

One note I'd like to make about this: the game is too damn good for me to play on breaks at work. I really try not to exceed the 15 minute allowance but keep doing it thanks to the addiction of combat. Being able to save any time does help, but stopping play to go out and deal with customers again just plain sucks.


This is not a fabulous way of holding down your current job! Like I should talk, though... I bring my DS with me to my office hours all the time. Heh heh. Suggestion: Why don't you just play AFTER work is finished, and leave less-involved games for your breaks?

And at home, I'm playing Lady Stalker. This is another Climax action-RPG, this time on SNES, and that company sure loves the isometric view because they use it AGAIN. It's an interesting game however, since an action-RPG that uses random battles is unusual. I find it kind of distracting not to know whether enemies are around until they zap onto the field. The main character is named Lady (wow for originality). There are two other characters who will join the party and apparently are controlled by the AI, one of whom is named Cocks.


It's true that they're unusual at first thought... though really, I can't say very well. Star Ocean: The Second Story comes to mind immediately, though not in the same sense that you're thinking, and the same goes for some Tales games, I'd bet. Actually, Rogue Galaxy might work something like that, though I'm not entirely sure about that either. So, take my great big ball of uncertainty and have some fun. <3

....You knew, or not, that The Sound of Silence is a song by Simon & Garfunkel?



Damn, the Treasure Hunter G soundtrack is having problems. In that case, I submit 1 piece of music from Tengai Makyou Zero. Why? Because I nominate its soundtrack as being quite impressive, and am curious as to your finding. This sounds unlike any other 'holy' music I have heard before, and quite refreshing.

Howcumzit, Matt, that this was not reported on RPGamer? Is it because a new Sakura Wars game is essentially guaranteed not to be in English?


Nay; it's because we've had a truckload of news lately concerning games that shall for CERTAIN be put into English, and those are the ones we like to emphasize here, as you well know. Perhaps there will be an update in the near future, though, but don't ask me... ask the news people.

I will NOT talk about something crazy in TMIV today, instead mentioning a neat feature. Since Alaska, Montana, California and Arizona are all on the first disc, they might be inaccessible later in some games. Not here: re-enter an old area and the game prompts you to put the disc with the relevant information back into the system. Isn't that nice?


Yes, and something that should be implemented in more games. It's so much better than the alternative, which I like to call "Horrible Final Fantasy VIII (and IX) syndrome," where the conveniently-placed evil TimeCompression (or BigTreeRoots) prevents disc-space overload in a most unnatural and infuriating way.

If you read the same Wikipedia entry I did, it would reveal that the Turbo Grafx-16 had the Turbo CD as an optional attachment and that later they were bundled in one machine as the Turbo Duo. AKA the PC Engine and PC-CD in Japan (which makes no sense given the usual connotation of 'PC,' but I didn't name the thing).


Oh, but didn't you know? PC = Pretty Cool.

I thought about going on at length regarding licensed games, but it'd make a far better editorial than letter. Same with my warped view on system and game acquisition.



I'm sure the eds people will be ecstatic, JuMeSyn. Besides, you've heard me rant on licensed games about three hundred million times by now, I think.

Until next time!


To Andrew (or Matt if missed),

Do you believe sites like SecondLife is some new type of MMORPG or just another social networking site like Facebook? I look forward to your sarkiness in your response. :P


I wouldn't call it an RPG. From the looks of it, I'd call it a cross between the Sims and Facebook. It can't be that big, since I can't say I know any Second Life players. I don't understand why any of these people don't have lives of their own. Why not put the energy into developing REAL friends?


The wait mode is over with, for all Sock 2 players who have been waiting for the past almost-a-week patiently. The game is back on today!

Otherwise, thanks much for reading. I got asked above, and now it's your turn: Which obscure RPGs would you like to see on the Wii Virtual Console... or Xbox Live Arcade, for that matter? Let me know, and you might just get a reply. You'll probably get a reply anyway, to be honest, but now you have something to write about.

Goodbye, everybody!

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Matt ate some KFC this weekend...

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On my Wishlist:

1. Dragon Quest IX

2. Fire Emblem: Goddess of Dawn

3. Super Smash Bros. Brawl

4. Dragon Quest Monsters: Joker

5. Metroid Prime 3

On my Portable Playlist:

1. Pokémon Diamond

2. Lunar Knights

3. Mega Man ZX

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2. Valkyrie Profile 2: Silmeria

3. Fire Emblem: Path of Radiance

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