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Michael Bischoff - July 10 '03- 23:59 Central Standard Time

Well, here I am again. For the two of you who actually enjoyed my turn in the Q&A chair back in November, I've got a delectible column whipped up for you. Now, I could use this widely exposed space to sound off my slew of liberal propaganda, and turn you all into Bush-hating Democrats, but LordBrian wouldn't like that very much. Besides, this is supposed to be about video games. If you really want to see some retarded political commentary though, go read my LiveJournal sometime. When I'm not complaining about my life in general, or posting a stupid quiz the rest of my friends took, I'm usually ranting about how King George is pissing me off.

Great, now those two of you have fled in terror. FBI agents will arrive at my door soon. I better get this column up for posterity sake.

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Money burns a whole in my wallet, does it do the same to you?

I have a question. What does it cost to go online with phantasy star? Also, I am unsure what you do in this game, do you shoot other players(online) or attack a boss as a team? Thanks


First you'll pay $50 for the game. Then you need an online adapater for your GameCube. The modem adapter costs $40, while the broadband adapter will set you back almost $90. These are prices I found on Amazon, and I can't find them on Gamestop or EB's websites, so good luck even finding them anyway. $8.95 per month is your online fee after spending too much to begin with. So, do you really want to pay $100 or more just for one game? As for knowing what you're supposed to do in the game, I'm as clueless as you. How about you waste all that money and tell me instead.

So this midget walks into a bar...

Divine Wind,

1. So.... really.... why are we sending our Q&A email to you? Is someone (God Forbid!) leaving Q&A, or did one of them get abducted by Uranians or something?

2. For Unlimited Saga, are the HP increases and new abilites to place in the grid after you finish a quest really random? I used to think that the skills you use in that quest affects what new skills you can place on the grid, and the amount of HP you lose during the quest affects your HP imcrease, but I can't find a pattern. I'm trying to find a good way to see how to get a good strategy for getting stronger, and maybe make a faq about it.

3. Will the Caffeinated Englishman ever be back? No offense to Lucca, but I'm just wondering.

4. Do you think there will ever be a possibility that Chrono Cross might be true, or even at least a new Chrono Trigger, and they could be released on the PS2?

5. Can you suggest a good punk band, basically anything with less angst and more rebelliousness (sp?)?

- Gabe "I like to pour acid on my lap" Ang

1. If you would have read Goog's Q&A closer, you'd have found out that she's headed for Japan.

2. I know nothing of Unlimited Saga because I'm poor and can hardly afford new games right now. I'm sure the boards will help you out.

3. I bet Lucca does take offense. Seriously, she busts her butt trying to bring you a good fan fiction update, and here you are pining for Stelas to return. I bet it's also because she's a woman, you chauvinist pig.

4. I assume you meant to say Chrono Break. And if you did, then I'll make it known that EVERYONE NEEDS TO FORGET ABOUT IT AND JUST MOVE ON WITH THEIR LIVES ALREADY DANG NABBIT. Seriously, stop fantasizing about a night of romance with CB and go import a mosquito simulator from Japan.

5. Anti-Flag, Propagandhi, Rise Against, Bad Religion

I need to play more games. Does someone want to send me Dark Cloud 2 for free? I'll let you guest host on Monday in return.

I just have two RPG questions for you.

First, what did you think of the storyline of Dark Cloud 2? I though it was impressive, but I'm curious to hear your thoughts on the plot.

Second, I have enough old video games to trade in for a new one, but do you think it would be wise to trade in my Game Gear for a new game before checking out to see if there are any spectacular RPGs for the old Sega system? In other words, do you know of any good or great RPGs for the Game Gear I should look out for before trading it in for the new Arc the Lad game?

That's it; have a good weekend.

Puppet NineTails

Kamikaze: Your curiosity will remain unsated. I hear the game is awesome though, so once I get more money, I just might buy it.

And, I can't even remember a single decent game period for the Game Gear. Trade all that junk in and enjoy Arc. Or, if for some reason you do not have a Game Boy Advance, I COMMAND you to buy one.

Now here is a decent question! Except for the last one, that is.

What reoccuring theme in RPGS would you like to see gone? I personally don't like the gaudy clothes a lot of characters wear. A good example is Lulu. It adds some character to the game, but hey, Princess Mononoke was a great anime with character, and no insanely designed dresses.

Also, In FINAL FANTASY II, what item is required to enter the Tower of Mysidia? ;)

Jessica Perkins

I want an RPG where the goal is not to save the world or the universe. How about an RPG where the characters start out as teenagers, their country goes to war, they enlist in the military, fight many battles over there, and the game reaches a conclusion based on what you do with your characters throughout the game. They could all die their first time in the trenches, thus game over. Or, they could rise through the ranks to become war heroes, and defeat the enemy's great army in the final battle of the war. That way you can fit in original ideas with RPG mainstays.

Oh, Crystal Rod, right? :)


I have a nintento and have the game (Zelda: LttP) above i am stuck on the first level. Where can i find help or a cheat book.
Sarah Gillingham

Michael: If you're stuck on the first dungeon of A Link to The Past, perhaps you should give up video games altogether and go outside.

What is your opinion on computerized conversions of PnP games?


Michael: Scarmie, I've never played one. But isn't the whole point of a Pen and Paper game to play it PnP, and not on a computer? Effing stupid if you ask me...

Last Requests:

Lucky me, the FBI went to the wrong house, and ended up arresting my neighbor instead. That means I'll be here on Monday after the vastly more entertaining Andrew Duff is finished showing me what a real Q&A column looks like. After Monday though, who knows who will be subbing for Mr. Slime. I might make another relief appearance after Monday, but my ERA is atrocious already. Batter up guys.

Today I got hardly any letters so hopefully you reward me on Monday with lots of them. I'll have some special guest hosts, and hopefully I'll have them known in Sunday's column so you can prepare in advance. Oh, and Pirates of the Caribbean for the PC isn't going so well. I did just start the game, so lets hope it gets better.

Y'all have a good weekend now, ya hear?

Kamikaze "Sarcasm Rules!"

If I offended you in response to your letter, too bad. Sarcasm (and the truth) hurts.

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