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Googleshng - February 22 '01- 2:00 Eastern Standard Time

Woohoo! I sat down to do tonight's column and found that ChocoMog ZERO had used his psychic powers to determine just what the song was I had stuck in my head (Engel, by Rammstein evidently), and sent me all the lyrics! Then I tossed'em through a terrible translation script to get the title for today's column. Ah, life is good.

Anyway, tomorrow JWH will be guest hosting for what I believe is the last time, seeing as someone finally ended up throwing a copy of Grandia 2 at him. So, give him a happy little sendoff.

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Lunar 2
Finally caught up to the end of the demo!
Hello ,OH, OMNI - slime

I recently played Vandal hearts 2 and i had a few questions wel thats if you've played it:

1. Is it just me or is it to hard to actually hit the the enemy you want?

2. I've gotten to the second chapter and do all the character pics look kind of "odd"?

3. i can never seem to keep the moves i learn with a weapon. As soon as i unequip it the move goes away. How would i go preventing that?

4. Finally am i the only one who thinks the first one was better?

The whole simultanious movement thing in VH2 takes a while to get used to, but you can pin it down after you've been playing a bit. If it's any help, it uses the EXACT same AI as the original, and will just about always go for the quick stab in the back on the closest character right away. As for the artwork... yes. That style bugs me too. Moves are learned by weapons, not by characters, however you can move skills from one weapon to another. It's a really bizzare way to handle that sort of thing honestly. Finally, I'm pretty darn sure just about everyone agrees that the original VH is a MUCH better game.

There's still fence sitters?
1.) my most important Q, is this....i have a little over 300, i can either buy a DC and like 3 games and a vmu....or i could wait forever until those bastards at sony start selling more ps2's and buy one of them...with no games or anything..what should i do? (keep in mind i LOVE rpg's.)
2.) i just beat shenmue (in 2 days) on a friends DC but i still wonder....why is it called shenmue..the only thing in the whole game i found that had anything to do with the name shenmue was the cassette on ryo's desk. 3.) is there any info at all about when the remake of FFVII is coming out, or what they are going to 'remake'...b/c i love that game.


Well, like you just said, for the same ammount of money, right now, you can either get a DC, a VMU, and 3 RPGs, or a PSX2 with, well, no games and no memory cards. That isn't exactly the hardest choice to make, especially considering that there really aren't any RPGs worth playing on the PSX2 at this point, and by the time there are, the price should have dropped a bit. Why Shenmue is called Shenmue is a pretty good question, which I'm sure will be answered in one of the sequels. Finally, while there isn't that much information around about any of the FF remakes, I honestly can't see them doing anything REALLY impressive with them considering how many they plan to crank out in such a short time frame.

FFT Translation
Hey, Slimy


I was recently replaying FFT looking for the supposed incomprehensibly mangled script, and I found that even looking for it, it really wasn't that bad. A few typos(like in this letter), a few phrases that don't quite fit, but nothing that kept me from understanding exactly what was going on all the time. So my question is: Why is the translation of a game such a topic of whining? 9 times out of 10, you instantly know what they meant even if the translators flubbed the words a bit.ĉ("I had a good feeling" to "I had a good feeling about this job" isn't really that big of a jump)ĉAnd even in the rare case that it takes a few seconds to figure it out, is that minimal frustration really enough to justify all this wailing and gnashing of teeth?

-The Man from Ganymede

For the record what I snipped was a bit of raving about Tuesday's lack of a column. It's really odd, but there's always been this strange phenominon about RPGamer Q&A where when the weekend person and weekday person switch shifts (So, Tuesday and Saturday's columns right now), there's always this HUGE dip in letters. Evidently most people for some reason just insist on sending letters only to the person whose column they just finished reading. Remember that though for the record, on those two days you have a much higher chance of getting stuff printed. Now then, getting back to the question at hand, I honestly think people in general are way too harsh on FFT's translation. Aside from the occassional odd choice of phrase, the actual dialog is just fine. The "bad translation" everyone always refers to is always found in the more out of the way areas. Job reports of course are the home of such amusing phrases as "I had a good feeling!" and "We opened the ore." The long versions of spells are often just plain odd, like "Strip the ground with glistening blades! Bolt!" There's the occassional inconsistancy with a name, like Rich and Clops, and then of course if you actually check out the tutorial, some stuff in there is just plain weird. Still, none of the myrad little things in there really hurt your understanding of the game, so in the grand scheme of things, it's a pretty good translation. Now Illusion of Gaia, THAT'S a bad translation. Constantly changes tense and person every other sentence and stuff like that.

Stuff and things
How goes the gaming, Slime Thing?

I've got to get this off my chest before I even start my questions. Final Fantasy VII and Final Fantasy VIII are disgraces to the Final Fantasy name. Thank you.

Alright, on with my questions.

1.)Are you or any other member of the RPGamer staff planning on purchasing Paper Mario? It's a little on the easy side but anyone who owns an N64 must buy this game. It's mad fun, it's strange, it's artistic... it's the Jet Grind Radio of roleplaying games. It took me away from Lunar: Eternal Blue and Tactics Ogre if that says anything.

2.)Any new news on the Arc the Lad Collection? I've been looking forward to this forever now.

3.)What's the chances Square will develop for Gamecube? Don't they have an exclusive contract with Sony? Or am I just on crack?

4.)What's with the different makeup person on "the Critic" now? And his old boss? It just didn't seem right without him making a gay comment towards Jay. Oh well... at least the Critic is back in one form or another. Now, if only the Tick would do the same.

Terry Rader

I would have bought Paper Mario by now if not for the little problem of being flat broke. A few other staffers have it though and I've been hearing generally good things from them. The Arc collection is coming along pretty well I believe, in fact we should be getting our preview copy of the first game shortly, so you can look forward to reading that. Square doesn't have an exclusive contract with Sony by any means, and in fact seems to be very interested in doing stuff on Nintendo's new systems. Nintendo however seems to be taking a stance along the lines of "So, come crawlin back eh? Well maybe we don't want you back!" Presumably that attidute is just for the purposes of humbling Square a little bit and they'll eventually drop it to usher in a new wave of wonderful goodness, but then again they might not. We'll all just have to wait and see. Finally, yes. Shockwave Critic is odd. Shockwave Tick would be pretty interesting, however, sadly, The Tick is being reincarnated in the form a a *shudder* live action series on Fox! Little Wooden Boy must be spinning in his grave... except of course for the little detail of being used to start a fire in a whale rather than being buried, but you know.

Minor Arcadian Spoiler

In Skies of Arcadia, after receiving the red moon crystal, Belleza steals the crystal and summons Recumen (red Gigas) well my question is, how do i beat him? everytime i attack it doesnt take anything out. And he has some strong attacks. Thanky


To put it quite simply, you DON'T beat Recumen. No matter how cool the Harpoon Cannon may be, a rinky dink little fishing boat has no chance of destroying an ancient Mech that more or less destroyed the world. The way to get through THAT little fight is just to stay on the defensive and poke around the thing to prove that there's simply no way you can touch it, then get the heck out of there and, well, I won't spoil it for you.

This letter is in regards to your theory in which a PS2 port of the DC's version of Skies of Arcadia would be insufficient and your blatant misconception as to the PS2 not being able to handle the conversion, I'd like to make a correct upon your behalf. You were indeed correct as to the near impossibility that Skies of Arcadia would survive a direct port from the Dreamcast to the PS2, but your technical jargon was incorrect. As you have mentioned, NURBS {Non- Uniform Rational B-Spline} is a technique used by the Dreamcast to represent a smooth/curved models on a three-dimensional plane, but this technique is somewhat obsolete. The PS2 also employs a mathematical routine to smoothen a polygonal object; this technique is known as Bézier curves, in which, instead of applying smoothening techniques to the raw polygon, the technique applies curves to the mere edges, thus reducing the processing power. As for the port of the actually game, the only factor hindering the process is the PS2's inferior VRAM as apposed to the Dreamcast - the PS2 only has 4MB of VRAM whereas the Dreamcast has 8.

-ObeseRoach, correcting letter editors on his spare time

Well, that's one of the most tech-savvy corrections I've seen in quite some time, thanks a lot!


The world is a torus? Is that what your hidden message was supposed to be? The world is a donut shaped object? INSANE!

It's true! take the map to any RPG and fold it so that going off the left edge brings you to the right edge and going off the north edge brings you to the south edge. Make sure it's not a really nice map though since you will end up wadding it into a torus by doing this and tht'll get it all crinkley.

Seeing as I have AOL, would I be able to get, say, netzero, and play PSO with THAT? Or am I destined to never enjoy PSO? -Traks

Netzero specifically can be a pain since it wants you to run a special little application while connected, but I'm told there's a work around, and just about everyone should be able to find a free ISP that'll connect if need be, or there's always what you're using to connect right now.

If the world's donut shaped, why hasn't someone attempted to put frosting and sprinkles on it? --Rico

Eww... have you ever eaten a big gob of frosting without anything under it? The stuff is actually quite nasty in large doses.

Lunar 2 rules :)


Happy Hour!

What's the difference between a # and a ~ (becides how you say them) ?


# comes before a number, ~ comes before a person's directory on a web page.

The Last Laugh:

That was a fun column, and look! Rad even sent in a comic!

By the way, a couple people have been asking me what I think of Lunar 2's ending this week. Didn't I just say that I literally just started the game? I only JUST got Jean before doing this column. Hopefully I'll squeeze some play time in this weekend between PSO, AD&D, and various other things.

Googleshng "That's a Chocob- er, Chuckuboo."
I understand the silverware, but why the dog? You understand the silverware? Coocoo! Coocoo!

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