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Googleshng - November 3 '00- 3:00 Eastern Daylight Time

Wow. Considering how bogged down everyone is with midterms I figured I'd get maybe 1 or two "Wow, 200, that's a lot!" letters, and the rest normal. Nope. Heck, I seem to have 10 times as much printable mail as usual today. Going to be a while posting all this stuff, so I'm probably going to be real late and forward the real questions to Gin as an offering to quench his firey wrath... or something. 8)

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First, some well wishes from coworkers
Hey Goog,

Congratulations on your 200th column. I thought I'd send you some column fodder. Since I'm currently addicted to Chrono Cross (It owns me. Badly), I thought I'd send you a question or two.

1) How badly does Chrono Cross own you?

2) I'm stuck. After all the badness in Fort Dragonia and getting through the Dead Sea, is one supposed to do something in Serge's original world before returning to the other world? I don't need exact details, but a pointer to the right area on one or the other world would be really nice.

3) Why don't people wonder why you have in your party... them? Talking to people who you got in your party in the other world only results in small changes to the dialouge... wierd.

Well, that's all I can think of right now. Have a great 200.

Matt "Nameless faceless New Media grunt!" Prince

Thanks. Now, for your questions, I'm not that addicted to CC, too many other games to play. At the part you're at though, if you're where I think you are, you're going to be flipping between both worlds for quite a while. Finally, look at some of the characters in that game. Compared to walking giant voodoo dolls, mideval turnip people, aliens, cavegirls, and undead clones, is seeing your exact double REALLY that odd? 8)

Yay! Goog is 200 years old! Happy birthday!

-A sick, delirious Chronodin

Carnsarnit! That's columns, not years, you young whipper snapper!

Hey Goog, happy 200th! =^^= I'm coming up on my silver anniversary myself (25th update)

My question is twofold:
One, do you remember being hired?
Two, do you remember your first question? No cheating!
(Then again, if you did, I'd never be able to tell anyway. Damnit :P)

-Paws, Points of View =^^=

Yes, I distinctly remember when I was hired. Was just a week or two short of a year ago actually. As for my first question, well, I just happened to see my first column the other day, so, yeah, it's kinda fresh in my mind. I'll wait until the 1 year mark to drag that sort of thing up though.

I'll draw you something for your 1 year mark, but right now I don't have the time... so best wishes... Oh! And a question...

How the bleep do you raise your characters' hero levels in VP? All of my characters are like at -50 right now, and Odin is starting to get SMURFy.


The points you get at level up can be spent on either skills, or traits. Spending points on traits skyrockets hero values. I personally suggest maxing them all out right away, then working on skills. Of course, if you never plan on sending someone up, you don't have to bother.

200 is a fairly round number in base 10, but in base 2 it's 11001000. That, like this letter, doesn't mean much of anything!



Now an ex-staffer
The time has come, dear goog. Happy 200th! Everyday is a chore, this former guru knows. Goog, my friend...In spite of all, we know you've toiled and more. Always know congratulations to the sexless, slimiest of them all.

- Jeff Davis, former Q&A guru

Heh, thanks.

and and old submitter... with presents!
Hello, Google!

Congratulations on your 200th post. I'm sending you some pic, like the old days. First is a screencapture I got from LUNAR depicting the greatest moment in video game history. Second, is the unintentionally funny Jack Chick comic entitled "Dark Dungeons" depicting RPG's as works of Satan. Third, I'll resend one of my favorite pics I did for you entitled "New Logo".

Before I get to the actual question asking, I must remind you that writing this letter to you is only facilitating my procrastination of writing my paper. So if my questions seem a little off, it's because my head is full of stuff about the proletariat and the bourgeioise.

Ok. Have you played Baldur's Gate 2 yet? It transcends awesome. Sales-wise, this is Interplay's best selling game ever. It picks up after the last Baldur's gate. (you can even import your old character) Many characters from the old game show up as playable characters: Jahiera, Imoen, and... yes.... Minsc is back! The guy with the hamster! Minsc alone made Baldur's gate better than FF8....well, that and actually having a "plot", but that's another rant.

Who is your favorite RPG villain ever? When I was a kid, Kefka was my dog. Now, I may be favoring Sarevok from BG or Ghaleon from LUNAR.

What anime's are you currently collecting/watching? I'm seriously enjoying Cowboy Bebop, Trigun and maybe "Lain". What's your favorite movie? I *need* to see "Castle of Caligiostro" and "Princess Mononoke". In the meantime, my favorite movie is "Grave of the Fireflies."

By the way, I recently asked the presidential candidates on what they think of anime.

Al Gore: I was instrumental in the founding and creation of tentacle rape films.

George Bush: Annie May was my favorite character on "Annie get your gun. " I could really relate to the troubles of that woman.

Ralph Nader: Watching Dragon Ball Z is unsafe for your cerebellum at any episode.

((Special note to all reading this: As of today, all jokes about Al Gore creating the internet and George Bush mispronouncing things are hereby "old" and "have been done." Thank you.))

And now... Haiku.

What is up with Link?
He wears a little green skirt.
He wears no panties.

Ranma numbs my brain.
Nippleless boobies abound.
Where is the nipple?

Otaku worship this show.
Shinji is a wuss.

What is that foul smell?
Otaku never shower.
Neither do Trekkies.

To everyone here.
I write. You visit now.

Now I must depart.
I have to write a paper.
Buy one get one free.

Cheshire "I will decide what is appropriate for children!" Catalyst

Wow. Must be a really annoying paper. Let's see here... I personally haven't played either BG... I'm not all that big on AD&D based games. Favorite RPG villan... I'd have to go with Kefka. Anime I'm currently aquiring includes: Escaflowne, Slayers, and Those Who Hunt Elves. Actually, I would have all of those now if not for the small matter of a certain shiny piece of plastic not working. Beyond that, I'll probably be sucked into getting Lost Universe, and that's it for the momment. Ooh, and as for your haiku... I personally have never tried to aim the camera up Link's kilt. Regarding Ranma... hiding in the manga version. I think that's everything now.

Now from Rad...

Happy 200th Goog, In honor of posting this many columns I bring you one of your favorite types of questions; Mythology questions! Specifically Wild Arms. Do the Guardians name's in Wild Arms really exist in any kind of mythology (or multiple mythologies?) The only one I know is 'Zephyr' which the Zephyr in the game is nothing like the actual Zephyr. Zephyr is suppose to be the Goddess of hope who rides on the easterly winds, I forget which mythology it's from though. Zephyr is not a male dragon. I've even gotten all the names listed for you for your convienence.

  1. Gurdijeff (Earth Rune)
  2. Stoldark (Water Rune)
  3. Moa Gault (Fire Rune)
  4. Fengalon (Wind Rune)
  5. Nua Shakks (Thunder Rune)
  6. Denogenos (Summit Rune)
  7. Stare Roe (Flash Rune)
  8. Ge Ramtos (Death Rune)
  9. Lucadia (Triton Rune)
  10. Ione Paua (Saint Rune)
  11. Solus Emsu (Heavens Rune)
  12. Aru Sulato (Ice Rune)
  13. Dan Dairam (Chrono Rune)
  14. Rigdobrite (Star Rune)
  15. Equitess (Sword Rune)
  16. Zelduke (Castle Rune)
  17. Odoryuk (Life Rune)
  18. Duras Drum (Hades Rune)
  19. Justine (Courage Rune)
  20. Raftina (Love Rune)
  21. Zephyr (Hope Rune)

    Okay, there. All done. Besides now if other people know they can answer it too. *Makes note of the possibility of Gin's box being flooded with E-mails on this subject. But it's not YOUR problem :) *


To my understanding, WA just features a large selection of names that sound mythological in origin, but aren't. If I'm wrong, tell me, not Gin.

Now a pseudo-staffer's thoughts...
Hoi hoi,

To honor everybody's favorite genderless slime, here's a reinstrumentized midi of everyone's favorite genderless being, Gogo! I present Theme of Googleshng.

--Ryan Mance


That name looks familiar
i Goog! I was just writing in to ask you if you knew the differences between Pokemon Gold and Silver (i.e., what monsters are in Gold that aren't in Silver and vicy vercy.)

Ribby "I AM SKEPTIC WOMAN!!!" ~@-@~

I'd post a full list for you, but then this column would be absurdly late. I'll throw one together and either send it to Gin tonight or post it tomorrow... or someone can save me the trouble and mail me one. Don't send it to Gin though. That's the sort of thing that prevents him from getting any other letters. 8)

hi there Google.

Since it's your 200th column, i thought it would be nice if i chronicled a few of the overasked questions i've noticed in the column.

1)what gender are you?

2)what's your favorite rpg?

3)i only have enough money to buy one game, which one of these (insert list of games here) should i buy?

4)what do you think of the ps2?

5)why won't you print my letters?

6)i like (insert anime title here), which others would you recommend?

7)can i be a guest host?

8)how can i get a job at the site?

well, that's all i can think of at the moment...there's gotta be more though.


You missed a couple, but they're on the FAQ... which I just updated last night.

Dear Googleshng,

Digging through my files, I recently came up with the following strange numbers in RPG history:

0: Number of people with noses...actually, Granstream Saga.
1: Number of party members who die but do not make a physical reappearance in Final Fantasy 4.
1: Amount, in cents, that FuncoLand will literally give you for certain old NES games. Thankfully, none of them are RPGs.
1: Number of people who have played, but not won Xenogears, at least according to the guy that's trying to get his question printed.
2: The number of Pokemon in R/B/Y which changed type in G/S. (Magnemite and Magneton)
3: Trilogies of Final Fantasies: one on the NES, one on the SNES, and the last on PSX.
7: Number of Q & A hosts with Radrisol identities.
8: Slimes needed to summon a King Slime in Dragon Warrior.
14: Max number of heart containers in Legend of Zelda: Link's Awakening, the lowest of all the Zelda games.
16: Maximum level in Crystalis, most likely the lowest max experience level ever.
17: English translation of Seibzehn from Xenogears. Achtzehn is, of course,
106: Tracks on the Wild Arms 2 Soundtrack
255: Max level in Star Ocean 2, the only game in recent memory with an attainable +100 experience level
300: Cost, in dollars, of a large pizza in Earthbound. Man, that better be one freakin' huge pizza...
700: Pages of text in the full script to Breath of Fire II. So imagine how much Xenogears must have...
900: Memory card slots in a virtual memory card system.
9999: Experience and gold gained by defeating an M. Slime in Breath of Fire. A friend of yours, perhaps?
25,000: Cost in Gold to upgrade a weapon to level 9 in Secret of Mana
36,000: Max HP of any Gear in Xenogears. Annoyingly enough, it's not Xenogears.
40,000: Dexdrive slots available on a 40 GB hard drive. Operating systems are frivolous, after all.
111,105: HP FF8's Omega weapon has...provided you can make it there on level 1.
129,987: The most damage that may be done in a single character attack in Final Fantasy 7, without a GameShark to raise stats. The most with one is 199,980.
3,000,000: Indalecio's HP with the Limiter off, on Universe Difficulty in Star Ocean 2. Bet it's more than you have.
100,000,000: The number of GameBoy units sold in all its incarnations as of June. That's over 25 billion potential pokemon...

Of course, the most important number of all:
200: Number of quality columns produced by one of RPGamer's most consistent staffers ever. Whatever you are, we appreciate you all the same. Maybe one day when they can slow down time, you can take some time off working on the site to celebrate.

Faithful reader and humble RPG database,

All together now everyone: "Awwwwwww!" Seriously though, even I can't swallow 200 QUALITY columns. There's a lousy one every now and again. Amusing list though.

One last old regular
Hi Google!!
Sorry its been so long since I wrote..... I've been...... occupied ::glances down at her watch to how long is left before her Doomsday Module self-activates and frowns:: Kurse it! Twenty-four hours left!!!!!
Anyhow...... HAPPY 200!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ::mumbles:: No one wished me a happy 10,0001 birthday..........! ANYHOW- 13 more days to FFIX!! Or is it 12? So I got a couple questions 'bout that.... Final Fantasy.

1) Do you know if the Cinema Star is featuring FFIX cups and popcorn boxes? 'Cuz if they did, it'd be super-kewl!
2) Do you know if chocobos will be in the FF movie? ::giggles uncontrollably:: Those things are sooooo adorable! And how can someone make a Final Fantasy WITHOUT them? They.... They..... they might as well call it a Chrono movie!
3) When's the FFIX music CD gonna be released?
4) Do.... do you still love me? Or have you grown some deep rage in your hearts for all the nights you spend at your computer thinking..... "Yes! I do believe Xenochick will write tonight!! It's been ever so long, and I KNOW she'll come back to me..... she's my half sister adopted twin that was lost in the Quadrimagi war that seperated our lands from the sky and ground ten years ago. Please..... Xenochick...... please show me you still exist.. that the demons shadows haven't claimed your spirit yet..... Oh God, GIVE ME A SIGN, XENOCHICK!!!!!!!!"
Or...... did I make you say, "Damn it Xenochick, I never wanted to hear from you aain!!!!!!! Go away!!!!!! You've ruined the Family Fortune! Now it's in the hands of our life-long enemy,!!!!"
Okay, peace out.... keep away of Krelian and his reactors. ACtually, keep away from ME and my reactors...... ka ha hahaha!!!!1

-Xeno"A Goddess of Death is merely for snuffing out lives... I guide them and show them the path"chick

.....Did I get that quote wrong? Oh well.......

Uhm... yeah... believe it or not, this isn't the most insane letter I recieved today. Now let's see if I can answer these. Your first question just leaves me staring blankly, don't punish Gin for that stare by flooding him, I'm pretty darn sure that seeing as the FFMovie is set in the real world, and just has FF stuck on it to make more money (Like Mystic Quest did), you won't see anyone riding Chocobos or talking to Moogles. They might stick games and posters in the background though. The FF9 soundtrack will be out "soon". Finally, uh, well, I just figured I'd check how many of the people who used to send me letters every single day, then stopped a few months ago, still read the column. I was surprised Rail "Creator of these absosmurfinghilarious Slime World doujinshis" Cayder didn't send me anything, but then I remembered he never read this column to begin with, just my page'o'rantings.


I have that game. Tell that guy you absolutely HAVE to wait until you listen to the whole countdown. Then the SECOND after he says "Three!" let go, making sure the grenade is right over the rabbit. With a little good timing and positioning, he should get it.

"One... two... FIVE!" "Three, sir!" "THREE!"


Do you know if anything will be given to the people who pre-order FFIX?

Yes. FFIX. 8P

Remember, the enemy is DOWN.


Yay! Random Ender quote! You botched it though. The enemy GATE is down. The enemey is spread out all over with superior weapons and numbers.

you said you were a witch for halloween
witches are females
so.......are you female?


You know ACTUAL witches (who don't like that term) have a fairly even gender ratio... but then the costume I ended up with was the green warty mask/scraggly long black haired wig deal, so moot point.

People keep mentioning Spam!
*see attachment*

Use it for spackle! Or bathroom grout!

The Last Laugh:

I really enjoyed doing this column. Between people sending me all these odd funny files that brought back some old memories, and a whole bunch of really good questions which I'll be forwarding to Gin, answering and person, and posting on Monday, today just really reaffirmed why I like doing this so much.

That's one last thing from Rad. There. I think I posted all the weird files people sent me except for THIS which was sent by Super Dynamo and is just plain sick. Now off I go!

Googleshng "Bicentenial Slime"
Who says I never do anything fun?

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