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Chris Martin - December 17, 2000- 12:00 Eastern Standard Time

The mall is insane, and it isn't just the crowds and high school choruses singing "Sleigh Ride" for the umpteenth time. Every time I walk into the local Electronics Boutique, I run into another old friend. Freaky. And they've all changed their hair.

Shop at EB! Meet old friends and purchase video games! Cha-ching! $$$ Sell out time.

We've got a great show for you tonight. Animal guy, Jack Hanna and singer Celine Dion will not be joining us, and "The Offspring" won't be our musical guest either.

Can't kill Kefka?
Ask Cheshire Catalyst Ha ha ha! You suck..

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In the PlayStation:
Final Fantasy IX
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The greatest game ever created by human beings.
We don't need no steeenkin' consoles!

Word up C-dude,
CC: word.
It's good to see a Q&A host who understands the true greatness of PC RPGs. Anyways, answer these, sucka:

1) Neverwinter Nights. Do you think it could be the greatest RPG ever?

2) Deus Ex 2 is supposedly in the works. Which ending do you think it'll take off from?

3) It seems the warm reception of Chrono Cross has cooled a bit...are people finally realizing the plot was pretentious garbage and that almost none of the 40+ characters were developed at all? (Nice soundtrack though.)

-Ybhan D'Ari

Cheshire Catalyst:
1.) Neverwinter nights, for those of you who don't know, will attempt to do something awesome. With this game, you will be able to real-time game-master an AD&D game over the 'net, LAN or somesuch. It won't use BG's engine, rather, a 3d engine not unlike the one from "Vampire: The Masquerade". In short, take RPGmaker and multiply its coolness one thousand times. That's how cool Neverwinter Nights will be... in theory. Greatest RPG of all time? That depends on how good of a Game Master you are ;)
2.)The development team of Deus Ex claims that they have a lot of material unused in the first game. Which ending? Ehhh.... **Probably the one where you join the Illuminati. Though I'm praying they use the one where you fuse with Helios and become the king of the world ;) **.
3.)The plot of Chrono Cross was the same, rehashed "Oh the world is in peril, and humans are to blame" plot. If I wanted that, Captain Planet comes on at 2:00. Basically, everyone got deep into the swing of "Oohh! Ahh! The coveted Chrono Trigger Sequel!" CC made the same mistake as Suikoden. Too many characters results in a lack of real depth. Also, it would have helped if the two worlds you travelled between were actually different. Maybe even a few more dimensions? Chrono Cross was good, but it gets my nomination for "Most overrated game of 2000".

Can you tell I'm short on letters?

My friend and I were discussing this all during social studies. Who would win in a free for all fight: Spike, Kaji, Mufasah (the father from the lion king) Captain Kirk (old days) A really big weasel, Pikachu, Mr. T, and Shaft?

Digital Osmosis

Chris Martin:

Heat One: "Scruffy Anime Characters" Spike likes to shoot his gun. Someone (presumably Misato) busted a cap in Kaji's ass. In short, Spike shooter; Kaji shootee.
Heat Two: "Ummm....yeah" Mufasa gets points for being in the only Disney movie I actually liked. Captain Kirk was always wrestling beasts though. But can Kirk beat a creature voiced by JAMES EARL JONES?! ... Probably. Captain Kirk has a laser.
Heat Three: "Fauna" If you stick a plug in Pikachu's anus, you can power Las Vegas for a year. A weasel will only give you disease.
Heat Four: "Angry Black Men" Shaft always got laid. Mr. T was too busy hanging out with Hannibal and teaching that "winners don't use drugs" down at the YMCA to get any play.
Semifinal One: "Space Cowboys" Spike is cooler than Kirk. Spike is a master of Jeet Kune Do. Captain Kirk's martial training amounts to "hit with fist".
Semifinal Two: "....Ok" Blam! "Pika chu Pi!" (Translation: "Ow! My %*!@in' leg!")
Final Bout: "Blarg!" Spike and Shaft realize that they both enjoy the same things in life, namely, beating up suckas. Shaft joins the crew of the Bebop.
Hope this answers all of your questions.

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I want to get a job at Rpgamer, and so, since you're the Q&A guy (who am I supposed to ask?) I ask you. Do you have any jobs you need done?

I barely made a fanfic submission to (Vengeance, which is the latest FF7 fanfic and will probably be the last) which wasn't very original but pretty good. Please send a reply as soon-or if-you can.


Chris Martin:
Basically, if and when we have a job opening, we will post it on the main page. When jobs are available, they're usually in the News department. Don't call us, we'll call you and all that rot.


I am the Antichrist of the Wired. I shall now spam you for all eternity! MWAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

-Esquire J

Eri Miasami already has that job, thanks ;) Interet Protocol 7 connects us all using Schumann resonance. Fun Lain Fact.

"Is this some sort of twisted Christian science?!"

Raidei the Blade, 9th Gung Ho Gun, Fifth Moon, Episode 16 of Trigun, Tape 5, Dubbed Version!!!!

Give me a hug and a cookie. You love Trigun, I love you. ^___^


You answered correctly, first, and in greatest detail. You win a kiss! I kiss you!

Can you please tell me what happened on the tenth day? it seems it got left out....


The Last Laugh:

Here's a fan comic by LightSoul!

I'll see you on Sunday!

chesh"If you're a little braver than most, then anyone can be a soldier. If you have a kind heart for others, then anyone can be a messiah."
No prize for this quote.

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