Ask Cheshire Catalyst  

   Stella By Moor  
Chris Martin- January 14th '01- 12:00 Eastern Standard Time

Information! Information! Coming your way. Once again, you have logged onto the information super highway, (or information gravel driveway if you're using a dial-up) to recieve information. It is part of our human nature to seek out the answers to the questions we ask! Wether those questions are "Is there a God?"(Yes, his name is Eduardo and he tells me to bomb Wal-Marts. They are an abomination unto Him) or "How many hit points does the final boss have in FFIX?"(60,000ish. Doesn't it suck?), I am here to answer them!

We have some wonderful, wonderful letters today. Enough with the boring intro! Into the letters....

Now you know.
Ask Cheshire Catalyst
And knowing is half the battle.
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Como se díce?
In the PC:
Baldur's Gate 2
The Underdark. Drow elves attack!
The Longest Journey
Don't blame me, blame organized religion.
In the PlayStation:
Lunar 2: Eternal Blue
No play today. Had homeowrk. :(
Assorted Nonsense

Who would win in a fight?

David Copperfield or Oliver Twist?

Ponder the solution, grasshoppah.
Google casts protect on self. Defense up 7 points.

Yesterday someone pointed out that I've been grumbling lately about the FF series being a tad tired, then turned around and said I couldn't tear myself away from PSO because "it has Phantasy Star in the title." A couple of points on this issue. The FF series has been going at a rate of about 1 game a year for quite some time, with each game having new characters in a new setting. The PS series on the other hand is just 4 games, with VERY connected plot lines, and there hasn't been one since the Genesis was alive and kicking. So there's a bit more of a reason for people to be drooling at the idea of a new one. Also, I for one am not saying PSO will be fun because it's an online Phantasy Star game. I am saying that PSO IS fun (I actually have it mind you), because it's a nice simple well designed multiplayer Action/RPG, which happens to have PS style graphics, and hopefully some sort of major plot connection.

FF9 spoiler kinda

By the way, did it bother you have FF9 breaks the tradition of throwing your whole party into the last fight? Get to the end of the game and find out all the time you spent character building the 4 characters you never use was a complete waste of time. They didn't have the star field either come to think of it.


Cheshire Catalyst:
From what I've seen of PS, it does look like a lot of fun. But what Google says is true regarding the FF/PS thing. Absence makes the heart grow fonder and such. If we hadn't had a Final Fantasy in years, we all would have been a lot more open to FFIX.

And that final boss thing did suck, but because I only cared about Zidane, Dagger, Steinerand Vivi the whole time... It didn't matter :)

A fan complains. Thankfully, not about my superflouous usage of the word "fart."

Dear Cheshire Kitty, (meow. *twitch*)

I'd like to say, I'm sick and tired of people asking me about the PS2. The common conversation I have at work with people who call in is this:

"Media Play customer service, how may I direct your call?"
"Hi, do you have any Playstation 2's?"
"No, we don't."
"Do you know how many you'll get in once you get them in?"

The thing is, it happens way too much. If any one wants to know, rumour has it that in the Media Play I work at, we'll be getting PS2's in around Easter. However, unlike before where you had to preorder them from us (reservation), these will be available to the public. I believe the cost is $300.

And please. PLEASE, if we sold out of them before you get here, DON'T YELL AT US CASHIERS! We've had enough of people b****ing about how us cashiers are SO incompetent, that we don't have any PS2's. YES! IT'S ALL THE CASHIER'S FAULT! You'll get the same answer about PS2's from a manager or a Cashier, or a Sales Associate. Live with it.

Now a question...
Do you think Dragon Warrior Monsters is worth buying? I liked it when my brother had a translated ROM, but I want it on my li'l game boy Color. Is it worth it? And will the second one be even better?

Thanks for letting me complain ^^;;

"How can you prove we exist? Maybe you don't exist..."
CC: The answer is simple. I think therefore I am. ;)

Cheshire Catalyst:
I feel his pain. I worked as a cashier in a bank this summer. In addition to being stuck next to the most fatalistic, whiny woman on the face of this planet, I got to deal with charming individuals who would wonder why we had to hold their check. I mean, they only wanted twenty thousand dollars, and they had bad credit...but hey! Here's my drawer, take what you need! Yeah, people are morons Winterheart. It sucks.
Dragon Warrior Monsters doesn't look like much fun. If you really want it, go ahead though.

My Advice. Take heed.

Stop Eating Never! Fatty Time Forever!

Now that I have you're attention with that little quote from FCIPH (or was that Seanbaby?), I'd like to introduce myself. I'm Troovis Howard, and i'm one creeezy party animal. OK, so i'm not. I do, however, have some questions.

1. I ordered Lunar 2 off of I should have it in a week or 2, as I had to pay with money order... stupid parents and their outdated beliefs on credit... uh, anyway... I was wondering how similar it is to Lunar: SSSC. I've been told that it's MUCH tougher, but with a more satisfying storyline. Whachu think, ehhhh?

2. Troovis has $250 in his bank account. A Dreamcast costs $150. The games he wants (Skies of Arcadia and Shenmue) cost $100, give or take. How long will it take Troovis to break down and close his savings account to enter gaming bliss?

3. I'm starting to take an interest in anime. I've seen Princess Mononoke, Neon Genesis Evangelion, Vampire Hunter D, and some more. What titles should I berate my odd local video retailer to get?

and finally...

4. Pepsi, Coke, or Faygo? (Choosing one of the 1st two will result in me getting real whiny and annoying)

I'd like to apologize for any stale humor used in this letter... nahh. Without overused, stale humor, i'd just be an RPGeek with no friends. Um.... wait a minute....

And remember, Chesh: Friends don't let friends boink beautiful demi-gods with hot tempers. Night, all!



Cheshire Catalyst:
First that is 1/2 of the official motto of FCIPH. The full motto is "Party Hats! Sandwich Cats! Stop eating never, fatty time forever!"

1.)Lunar 2 can be tricky. I've won a few boss fights by the skin of my teeth. [That's disgusting. Teeth have no skin. - Prof. Cranium] It's a little harder than the original I think. The story's different too, but I think they're about equal in that respect.
2.)You've bought them prior to reading this column, haven't you? Hey, it sounds like money well spent, but you definetly want to think about spending THAT much money on a whim.
3.)Run! Run away, before the anime beast eats you! Too late...
Escaflowne is fun if you enjoy a good fantasy setting. Trigun is an awesome series. And my personal favorite, Cowboy Bebop, is seriously cool. But I'd suggest watching Cowboy Bebop last. After watching it, all other anime seems to disapoint me. :(
4.)RC. It's cheap and tasty.

More Questions

Hello there!
Here's a bunch of questions for you, feel free to pick any.
1- Is the FFAnthology worth buying? I've never played those games but I'm weary of the negative comments about the slow interface and the disappoiting music. How good are the stories/characters? (I dont really care about the old graphics)
2- Ok, I'm completely at loss about Chrono Cross' ending, the "good" ending, that is. So the dragons are now your enemies and you have to combat that last boss, but what happened to Harle? And to Lynx for that matter... Just call me confused.
3- How old are you?
4- Any clues if the game Hoshigami : Ruining Blue Earth has been released in Japan or/if it'll ever get here? I'm drooling just thinking of it.
5- Pokémon or Digimon?
6- Do you think Skies of Arcadia will come to the PC?

Cheshire Catalyst:
1.)Final Fantasy 6 has one of he best stories and cast characters in the history of RPGs. FF5 is pretty good too. I didn't find the music to be poorly ported, but there's this slow transition between random battles and going back to the main screen. It's a little maddening. If you're willing to look past that and the aged graphics, then you have two damn fine games there. ;)
2.)Ok. After you destroy FATE, and it's living manefestation in Lynx, Kid tries to use the frozen flame. This pisses off the dragons to no end and they all come to fight you. It is revealed that Harle is actually, the seventh Holy dragon. And that isn't the last boss. ;)
3.)Old enough to know better.
4.)No information now, we'll keep you posted.
5.)I'll have to go against the opinions of many of my colleagues and pick Digimon. They're both annoying as Hell, but at least the digi-kids are trying to save the world. Ash is a snot nosed brat collecting monsters. I hope he is eaten by his Charizard.
6.)I don't think it will. :(

Japanese Cuisine 101: Eat Shitake and Die.

Heya, "Angry" Cat Scientist (watching too much Sheep in the Big City)

Which country would you rather live in: United States or Japan? I mean, Japan's technology is months ahead of ours, and they get all of the good RPGs before us. However, the US's cost of living is much lower, our language is the standard throughout a large piece of the world, and we can honestly say that we've never lost a war (Vietnam doesn't count). Would you prefer to live in RPG Utopia that had economy problems and nuclear fallout, or in a more stable country filled with newbies and six year olds with Pokemon Yellow glued to their GBC's.

BL Alien

Cheshire Catalyst:
I like where I live. So what if Japanese kids get to play video games seven months before I do? Living in Japan would mean that I would have to eat Japanse food to stay alive. I tried Sushi once, and I can say with complete certanty, that it was the single worst thing that I have ever put in my mouth. And that's no idle comment. I worked off my student loans as a male prostitute in Venice.

In all seriousness, I like where I live. Japan doesn't strike me as "fun" as the United States. Hey, I'm not knocking their country. It's really clean over there. Plus, they have an excellent work ethic that keeps the country running. However, I feel that the "nose to the grindstone" approach to life has held them back in key areas. Namely, the critical areas of humor, music and food. I think Dave Barry described it best. If nations were TV characters, Japan would be Joe Friday and the US would be Norm from Cheers. Joe Friday, in black and white, works hard all day, seeks just the facts and is one hundred percent no-nonsense. Norm has a job, but just to buy beer. He's a little lazy, but he's an all around nice guy. Personally, I know who I'd rather hang out with. (Admittedly, Joe Friday is still one of my heroes though. No man can tell off a hippie like him. ;) )


So what do you suppose GINGER is?


No idea. But it sounds really cool. ;) I just hope we're not setting ourselves up for a letdown.

I will never stop playing Burger Time!!! You can't take it away!!!


Ahh. Burger Time. The first and only game of the sandwich assembly genre.

Hal Jordan was the best. Hey, it's not his fault that Cyborg Superman screwed with his hometown and Hal went psycho. And Zero Hour was sweet.

Ms. Pac-Man is hot. Gotta love that nice big mouth.

Christoph, "was that crude? Sorry, I'll try to care next time."

Zero Hour was cool. Emerald Twilight was fun too, in a sick way. Hal Jordan was great, but he got saddled with the second dorkiest weakness of all time (Number One being Captain Planet's aversion to styrofoam). The color yellow. If Hal Jordan went to AnimeLand, he could beat the crap out of Lina Inverse, Goku, Eva Unit One, and Vash The Stampede. But Pikachu would kick his butt. That's just wrong.

The Last Laugh:

Letter Time is over. That is so sad. :( Come back tomorrow. I'm going to go play some Lunar 2 and resist the urge to order pizza. ;)

Chesh"In this world there is neither love nor justice. There is ONLY the shine."
Be Sure to drink your Ovaltine!

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