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questionanswer&andrew


I'm the Beef

Andrew Long - January 7, 2005 -03:15 EST(Eastern Standard Time)

SO ANYWAY, it seems as though a certain someone has managed to drum up more controversy in a week than I've been able to create in a year, so I'll be making a few changes around here. For one, we'll be introducing a new lesbian robot sidekick to spice things up, and can a romantic affair between googleshng and his secret admirer be far behind?

LESBIAN ROBOT SIDEKICK, L-X4

I FEEL COMPELLED TO INFORM YOU YOUR ROBO-CHOICES MAY BE UNSUITABLE FOR VIEWING AUDIENCES. BLIP BLIP BEEP. OH HOW I LOVE THE TOUCH OF ANOTHER FEMALE...ROBOT, THAT IS. ROBOT!

Andrew, Dr. Evil Pinkying

Oooh! Muuuy caliente!




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Mommy, Where Do Chocobos Come From?



Shed a tear for crossfire
No more Tucker Carlson
Claiming I have nothing
Nothing better to do
Than dogsled
MSNBC's loss

Clearing out the oldies


As much as I'd love to write into the column all the time, I don't really have a lot of questions to ask because your site does a good job of keeping me informed. I am, however, wondering about the developer Level 5. I know they made Dark Cloud 2 (which I got for Christmas and is by far the best Action RPG I've played since good ol' Secret of Mana) but I can't seem to think of (and too lazy to look for myself) any other game titles to their name. Also, do you happen know who composed the music for Dark Cloud 2?

ANDREW
Nishiura Tomohito did the honours on the soundtrack, while Yano Chidai cobbled together the opening J-Pop theme off of old matchbooks and sugar packets. As to the "Where Are They Now" portion of your question, well... A few months back, Level 5, always a company to realize a good trend when it sees one, took that original piece of art that S-E hyped up FFXII with, modified it some, and threw it up here. I remember thinking at the time "boy, did they modify that original artwork that S-E hyped up FFXII with, modify it some, and throw it up here. Those handsome devils!" Then I watched some tentacle porn.

XL-4
ONE ADVISES YOU HE IS LYING, GOOD READERS! HIS MOTHER REFUSES TO ALLOW HIM ACCESS TO PORNOGRAPHY AND SWEEPS HIS HARDDRIVE DAILY! BLIP BLIP BEEP! BOY IS SHE A GREAT LADY!

About female protragonists, males are clearly the majority but off the top of my head I can think of a couple games with female leads: Wild ARMS 3 had Virginia, SaGa Frontier let you choose a Asellus or Emily as your protagonist, and Suikoden 3 had Christ Lightfellow (I don't see why people say it was a bad game. I adored Suikoden 3.)

--The Irken Child has neat shoes.

ANDREW
People probably say it's a bad game cuz it's different from the first two Suikodens and when good games have different sequels, people kind of scratch their heads. Then they bitch at the developer when it listens to their headscratching and gives them the knockoff they've been clamouring for. Don't believe me? Wait a few weeks... Suiko 4 is allllmost here!

XL-4
BLIP BLIP BEEP! IS THIS EMILY BY ANY CHANCE A ROBOT?

ANDREW
You know, XL-4, you're probably going to come across as a pretty insensitive depiction of a lesbian robot if you don't watch yourself. Do you have to be so lecherous about it?

XL-4
TALK TO NETWORK EXECUTIVES, BIO-CLUMP! NETWORK EXECUTIIIIIVES!

ANDREW
Network executives? Okay, on that note, let's bring back the angry squid!

ANGRY SQUID
SBLLLOOOORP! I never left, fleshling! I merely paused to devour your family! WHOLE! YOUR KITCHEN REEKS OF INK!

ANDREW
Maybe if I take up smoking I'll die before I have to write another column....


Mmm... that cool, sweet sensation, it's filling my one lung! It's all the richness I could ever want!


"Well, like it says in the only place I've really mentioned playing WoW... an undead warlock/tailor/skinner. And if you think tailor/enchanter is cheap, talk to me again when you're above expert. "

Haha!! I meant initially they are more affordable. The tailoring was pretty much instantly do-able and profitable. Once I had taken it up and gotten some Linen, I had a whole new, awesome wardrobe! And I am lucky enough to be in a guild full of people who are willing to donate supplies to me all the time. And I very rarely ever buy supplies. If I need more silk cloth, or items to disenchant, I go and farm them myself.

You're a tailor/skinner? Why that combination? Just curious, because, though tailoring requires a few pieces of leather here and there, for the most part, skinning has not much to do with tailoring. Do you skin just to sell the leather? I'm not knocking your choices or anything, it's just a strange combination to me. Of course, there's nothing that directly goes with Tailoring, like there is for leatherworking, engineering, blacksmithing, and alchemy, etc.

Kelley

ANDREW
I probably shouldn't steal this question, but... Goog didn't take it, so what can you do? My guild is also a lovely sharing place, though we as yet have no tabard due to their hideous expensiveness. The tailor/skinner thing doesn't quite make sense to me either, but you do have to consider that skinning can be pretty lucrative once you get to an auction house, where for some reason people are willing to pay ludicrous amounts for things that would take them seconds to scrounge up themselves. Of course, I guess those high level players have better things to do, like raids against Razor Mills.... or the gates of Orgrimmar for some reason. I don't quite understand the mentality behind such suicide attacks, but hey - it was fun to watch all the high-level players ride up and wipe the floor with them, so who am I to complain? Anyhow, I hear that magecloth can be pretty pricey, so it probably doesn't hurt to have some extra cash on hand, and if you happened to earn that cash by charging 50 times what your skins should reasonably be worth, well - so much the better!


An interesting query


I was just wondering, how many RPGs out there offer battles between modes of transportation? I can think of the obvious Skies of Arcadia and also Wild Arms 3 but other than that, I don't believe there are many titles that offer something of this calibur.

ANDREW
If you look hard enough, you can usually find at least one instance of this sort of thing in many games; off the top of my head, fighting the Imperial Air Force in FFVI, the motorcycle races of CT and FFVII, and heck, I guess even the ship-to-ship combat in games like Earth & Beyond and SW:G, all sort of qualify, though the games you mention really do a better job ^^;;

Word of Honour: I am not a bank vault


Dear Friend and fellow coffer,

Reading through most of the Q & A's I know asking this might be a lost cause but I'll give it a shot.... I like MMORPGs but I have one question. Do they all take so long to get into? I played Lineage 2 for about 6 months and didn't even make a dent. I then switched to Final Fantasy XI and there was an improvement but still it takes awhile. Now in all fairness I'm probably not doing any of these games any justice as (like the majority of gamers) I don't have a lot of time to play. So my question is is there any MMORPGs out there that don't take a lifetime to get deep into? I love the level progression of games like Neverwinter Nights and Diablo 2 (and yes I know neither of them are MMORPGs but they do have online capabilites). Any suggestions will be greatly received.

Kuropka

ANDREW
Well... I've only spent 3 days(in-game, mind you) playing WoW and I'm already approaching halfway up the skill chain. It's much, much faster than FFXI, at any rate; I played that forever and still only managed a pitiful level. Then again, I hated FFXI with a passion, so that probably had something to do with it. On the other hand, I seem to be constitutionally incapable of hating anything made by Blizzard. Go figure!


Sure thing, Giant Beer...


Hi

THis might seem incredibly stuipd of a question to ask but, is the Panzer Dragoon series an RPG, if so is shouldn't be called a shooter/RPG?

The other question is that, I do own a sega Saturn with nights into dreams and panzer dragoon zewi. I wanted to find out if it was worth it to buy another sega saturn with 13 games including nights into dreams and sonic R and a 3-d controller for nights into dreams, for 50$ and just sell my old one. My old one dosn't have an internal battery, and my nights is all scratched up and lags alot. Please help me out!

P.S I know I have to buy Dragon force.

Bye
Mogexpres

ANDREW
One game in the Panzer Dragoon series is an RPG; the rest are shooters. As to your eBay quandary, you probably won't make squat off the damaged goods, so you're probably better off just giving them to some hapless cousin or something, but the $50 isn't a bad deal. Seeing as how Saturns are increasingly difficult to find, if you like the games, you should pick it up. That said, try and take better care of it this time, yes? You wouldn't want us thinking you were some sort of disc-eating buffoon, would you?

P.S. Thanks for sharing, Mogexpres.


Unfit for Print


Was the 6rd's QNA-title a reference to the Leonard Cohen DVD "I am a Hotel"?

If so, why the sympathy?
Leonard Cohen is cool.

-DNE

ANDREW
Huh? No he isn't! He's awful! Someone who descends into Eastern mysticism just so he could unceremoniously emerge and write even more terrible music a few years later does not deserve your respect! Sorry... I know I shouldn't say such things, but you (hopefully) have never sat through a Juno Award ceremony where he TRIED to sing "Closing Time" and couldn't hit the low notes! HE HAD TO START OVER!

...I hate forcefed Canadian content^^;;



DA LAST GRUMBLE

For tomorrow, I enjoy talking about WoW so much that I think I'd like to talk about it some more! Soah... let's talk WoW, cuz I just can't get enough of that game!

castomel@rpgamer.com
Andrew Long jumped the shark on December 10, 1975.

WE'LL PROVIDE THE ANSWERS, YOU PROVIDE THE

QUESTIONS


But never fear, I've got stories for years!

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