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And Then It Hit Them - He Wasn't Wearing Any Pants!

Andrew Long - March 20 '04- 14:38 Eastern Standard Time

My will to live has been crushed by ninjas. Are you a bad enough dude to score me some illegal pharmaceutical narcotics to cheer me up?



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First overall?
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Wishing will only bring doom
Such is the life of a Leaf fan

When a butterfly grows wings, on a creepy-crawly thing...

Right then. I've been way too busy being cold here in Canada. As such, I've totally lost touch with the inside world of RPGs. It's warming up, a bit, here, and I've got some pockets of time I need filled again. Help me, please.

What's been going on for the last six months, what should I be looking forward to, who should I be paying attention to, what wagons are cool and which bands are not, why're we debating and what are the petty arguments, and God Almighty, RPGamer is still here!? You'll never die.

You'll save me a lot of time reading (like I play RPG's to read, yeesh) through archives and drudging through outdated news. I miss geekdom so very much.


Well, in the last six months, many things have happened, compadre (you have to address me as compadre now, since it's the cool thing to do after Dream Force VI, a series of monthly installments that's really the bees' knees). While you were experiencing your geek to butterfly metamorphosis, for instance, Mothra completed a similar process and decimated large parts of Square Enix headquarters, reversing the merger and making Namco the undisputed king of Saturday night, which really sucked for SNL, since it had to pull out an all-Asian cast to compete for airtime on TLN (Berlusconi was livid, let me tell you!). Following this change of overlordship, Square Enix retreated to its mountain fortress, where it regrouped its forces of deliciousness and prepared for a renewed assault on the vigour of Sweden's men, which is currently going off with fierce pockets of resistance in Stockholm, and Madagascar for some reason. The results in gaming terms? Final Fantasy XI, A Nintendo handheld with not one, but two screens, a whole lot of babble about Xenosaga, a new and slightly less shadowy CEO for the Phantom console, which has also been in skirmishes with Mothra over the skies of Denver, and unprecedented popularity for dating sims.

Either that, or nothing. It's been an exceedingly dull half-year.

Memories of Green

Oi Castomel,

As for usage being 95% of the law when it comes to grammar, I'm for it on principle, honest. Up to the point where "it's" becomes a possessive because "everybody uses it that way." "Its" is a "thing" with me. We've all got our "things." Right?

About Harvest Moon. Don't be swayed by the correspondent who lists off a bunch of what they considered "rare" HM titles. "Back to Nature" and "Save the Homeland" are a couple of years old, but are readily available and what's more, they're cheap ($20 US). "Friends of Mineral Town" and "It's a Wonderful Life" are brand-new, so I doubt they're rare already. If, for some reason, these games are not available in Canada, I'll send you one! Not to worry!

Well, the free games racket is a good one, but I'm pretty sure I can find them if I put my mind to it. Besides, my vague resolutions to get them are just that - vague.

I've tried playing "Back to Nature," and haven't had much luck. I wasn't excited about the schedule-heaviness of it, the visiting certain places at certain times of day when a day lasts something like ten minutes. Note, I have little experience with RTS games; this is likely super-lightweight stuff for someone well-accustomed to them.

Also, in BtN the general scenario is that you're supposed to have a farm "of a certain quality" by the end of three years. It would be beyond discouraging to finally get a good handle on how the game works, and in the end be told by the town leader "Your farm is not up to our standards. Get out!" I don't know how harsh or lenient the judgment system is, but the idea is enough to make me hesitate to play.

Here's a question... any ideas how I could pre-order "Growlanser Generations"? I haven't delved too deep into trying, having only visited a couple of "major games retailer" websites and Working Designs' own site. But the retailers seem not to have heard of it, which is troubling because I don't see GG having a huge print run. In any case, hints as to where I (and my strat RPG-lovin' pals) could try to pre-snag a copy would be most appreciated.


Yeah, you're probably right about that print run, since Working Designs likes to maintain its cachet by stinging it up on release (or maybe they just can't afford big press runs, which I somehow doubt... who knows?) so your worrying is valid. For pre-ordering, I'm not too sure what to suggest; if major retailers aren't stocking it, and WD isn't offering it, it's probably not available for pre-order yet. This is also generally in keeping with WD tradition, since if there's one thing Vic and the boys love, it's big hoopla surrounding any preorder campaign (since big hoopla means big orders). My advice for the time being is to be patient - it's in WD's best interests for you to hear about it when they do trot out the Growlanser stuff, and it's probably not too far off (if I had to guess, I'd say they'll probably at least announce their plans at E3, since they don't have anything else on the go at the moment).



It seems that the snowy fury is begining to melt outside. Ah, but just think, winter didn't want to officially end without handing out free samples of it's future products. Those great times gasping for breath and getting hypothermia, such great memories. Now back to you Christine Brinkley! No wait, she's still locked in the closet, drats! As per the future game topic that will never be localized and shipped...nevar!! That's the problem. See, with my inability to get past games, it looks like I'll first have to get some of those first before I worry about games that I may never focus my eyes on. Xenosaga, Kingdom Hearts, Disgaea...all games on my growing list of "will-haves". But if a game does look interesting and it's not transported overseas...I wouldn't be freaked out or anything. I mean, we never got the Pocketstation for FFVIII, so what's the big deal? Since Japan and N.A. partnerships have improved since the early 90's, there will only be a few games that we wont get. What it all boils down to is that we'll get a lot of stuff, if we don't get something it's not the end of the world. Cause Japan is the rox0rs...or something. Did you go see Dawn of the Dead? Did tui drag you? Permiscuous thoughts? Sally Field kidnapped? Barbara Bush is really a woman?! O.o Anyways, I'm sure you can make a lot of money by selling your immune-deprived organs on eBay. So if they still don't listen to that threat you could always take somebody elses, you know?

The dream isn't over yet,

O' Shrouded One

Nah, I didn't actually go see Dawn of the Dead... I just figured that Google would probably devour me like so much gold piece if I didn't at least mention a zombie movie upon its release. And hmm... I never really thought about that whole organ selling thing with faulty organs, although I can't imagine that'd get me much good feedback. How unfortunate!

Dawn Of The Dead sucked compared to the original. Running zombies are lame.

Kaiju Munky
Thanks for sharing, Kaiju. I guess now that my dreams are shattered, there's nothing left to do but RUN TOWARDS YOU AND EAT YOUR BRAIN!


So, Blizzard started its beta and I didn't get in. This makes me angry like one of those little yappy dogs, so I'm going to have to beg you guys for information on what it's like so that I can live vicariously. Because if you can't live vicariously through someone, then why bother having famous people? That, then, is next week's topic, and for those of us who didn't get in, I guess other MMORPGs will do nicely.
Andrew Long somethingsomething.




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