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Andrew - March '28- 12:00 Central Standard Time

Let me make this clear. I am NOT upset that thanks to certain stupid delays I will not be getting Zelda until Monday. I am NOT upset that my allergies are acting up, and I am NOT upset that my face feels like itís on fire. Now, ON TO THE FREAKING LETTERS!

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ArfenHouse the Movie!
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L33t speaking Chinese. If anyone can save us from the apocalypse, they can.

Hey there first time writing in to you, so I would like to say Ni3 Hao3!!! (hello in Mandarin Chinese)

Mild Suikoden III Spoiler

The most confusing thing to me was the dancing talking dog and the dog you could be in Suikoden III. What was the reason for them having a dancing dog.

Spolier done

Worst Gaming moment was probably realizing that I had spent over 200 hours on FFVIII trying to get a perfect character and then realizing how much I hated it. Then, I decided I wanted to beat the damn game this year but my third party card is stuck on one set of files so I can't get at it.

I have been reading the archives (only to the beginning of the year as of now) and noticed that everyone hated Chrono Cross. While it sucked compared to Chrono Trigger, what doesn't? FFVI and PDS (according to most) and maybe a handful that are okay when compared to it.

S.H. Silver

P.S. FFIX is somewhat underated. It wasn't great but wasn't bad. Any way Zai3 jia4n xia3o tu4!!! (see ya little rabbit)

1. Dancing dogs, much like talking squirrels, sarcastic weasels, and sexy cat girls, exist solely to please the furries of the world. The sick, sick furries.

2. Yeah, I felt the same way after reaching level 30 in the first area with Squall and realizing how futile it was. I hates you FF8!

3. I liked Chrono Cross. The people who didnít like it generally collected all the characters and spent most of the game playing with Lucky Dan and the Mexican wrestler. Idiots.

4. I liked FF9 too. Sure, it was a little too melodramatic, but hey, most Final Fantasy games are. Except FFTA, which looks like it was created for kids 12 and under.

He was a dragon man. Ahh...maybe he was just a dragon...

Hey, I know I've already got plenty of attention on the site right now thanks to the latest update of the music page, but I thought I'd point out a remix I just recently finished that doesn't exactly qualify for RPGamer's music section, but I thought you and the readers might enjoy it anyway.

Cut and paste the link in IE (because Geocities sucks)

I hope you enjoy listening to it as much as I enjoyed making it. Maybe I'll eventually work up the courage to actually send it to the brothers Chaps one of these days.

- Justus Johnston, Composer of music, Firebell Inc. ( - Video game music originals and remixes. Get my latest at

Hey, GREAT MUSIC, Justus. Iíve been listening to your other songs while writing the column, and Iím very impressed with your clever use of remixes and original lyrics/music. And hell, when was the last time I was ever impressed? If youíre a Strong Bad fan, youíve got to give this one a listen!

Mighty two-handed action!

how come Link is left handed in all in previous Zelda games, but is now right handed in the Wind Waker? Is he ambidexious or something?

just wondering,


ps. u can tell espcially well in Ocarina of Time and Majoras mask, cause he holds the sword and opens doors with his left hand. but now he uses his right! that is so mean, its was so cool to have a left-handed hero!

Heh. Looks like someone hasnít played enough Legend of Zelda: Link to the Past. Take a look when Link walks right or left...see it? Yep, thatís right, Link is ambidextrous. So ambidextrous in fact, that when he turns in LttP, he switches his shield to his other hand. Ahh...what started as a silly graphicís error has become the worldís first really agile hero!

Australianís needs more training to become truly l33t.

what with all these portable tactical RPG`s coming up , (FFTA, onimusha tactics) I thought I would let you in on me and my m8`s way of killing time during those boring school days. We played tactics ogre, but we each made a character who was `ours` and we took it in turns during battles when it was our characters turn! sounds simple and rather lame , but If you have a regular crew of bored m8`s then give this a try ! its like playing DnD !

In something entirely unrelated , how did you go about playing FFtactics? I`ve completed the game now, but I restarted any battles which I lost any characters in... thus my casualties rating was 0. but can you play this game like a war situation? where you treat your units as expendable etc, can you tell me a good way of doing this ! thanks

Sorry, but I valued each and everyone of my brave troops in Final Fantasy Tactics. Well, except for all the chemists that got killed in the first battle...nevertheless! Iíve never liked playing games where you have to sacrificed mass numbers of people for the greater good. Call me a silly idealists, but I really donít like the idea of killing off my soldiers when I could just employ some strategy.

Go ahead, make my day. Oh...wait. You did! ^_^;;

Hello Andrew!

I was wondering if you would not mind if I tried something with your signature pic. With your permission and your suggestion, would you allow me to draw a short anime comic starring you as your...rabbit?

I have good artistic talent, and I have been gone so long I wanted to try to make a comeback through the different parts of RPGamer. I want to start off with something cool to show off my true potential so I want to try something with your image...if you allow that. Otherwise, I will think of something else.

Thank you and goodbye,

KaPowie K1

Iím very flattered. You have my permission to create such a comic, but only if you show me a preview of it before submitting it for public viewing. This is only because I donít want to be depicted as a baby-eating psychopath who sticks nails through his toes.



I just found out about the hidden text and teh monkey with the guy with heart power ruled. So what if they gave the really shitty power to the under-represented minority.

I completely disagree. ALL the planeteers had really awful powers. I mean, come on. The American had the power of fire? Who didnít see through that little metaphor?

...though it was pretty funny that the German girl had the power of wind. Teehee...

For all of us holding our breath to get Venus & Braves stateside, what do you think the probabilities are and who can we call//mail//email to tell them we want it over here?

Keep up the excellent work.


The only reliable answer to Venus & Braves fans is hit yourself in the face with a frying pan until you forget about the gameís existence, so you can spend the rest of days blissfully unaware.

...or in a coma.

Shining Soul has been fully translated into English and released in Europe. It costs about $40-45, which isn't much more than other GBA RPGs. The GBA does not require any additional things to play imports.

Interesting. If anyone has imported it, can we get some comments on it? The screenshots make the game look pretty fun.

This is what I read off a website concerning FFTA..

"Marshe, Mute, and Ritz journey to restore their world to normal after accidentally turning it into a land of swords and sorcery."

Please tell me this is not true.

- Lyle

Completely true. Say goodbye to political intrigue and desperate battles! Now, most of the units are incredibly cute, anamorphic creatures! But come on, who doesnít love games where you play as an overly violent preteen who spends his time murdering hundreds of small fluffy animals that stand on their hind legs?

I was just wondering Final Fantasy Unlimited doesn't have a released version that's english or subtitled, does it? If so. I want one and where can I get it?

P.S. What exactly does "P.S." stand for anyway?

"And that is what they say is that"
-dude that I forget his name of FFX


P.S stands for ďPost ScriptĒ, but in your case, it could also stand for ďPretty StupidĒ. Final Fantasy Universe is, at best, a sub-par anime that rips heavily from oh, Digimon, was cut short, and has very few redeemable points. Yes yes, Kaze is a bad-ass. Too bad he stops being cool after you realize he does the same damn thing in every episode. While Iím sure FFU will wander over to the States eventually, I certainly wonít be picking it up.

Regarding Zelda: The SLIMES are back! THE SLIMES ARE BACK! WOOOO!


Shouldnít this go to Google? Unless the game has those adorable rabbit heads from the first game, Iíll keep writing letters to Nintendo, demanding the return of their almighty bouncing fury.

The Final Grumble:

As you may or may not have noticed, my links for this week are for the same thing...almost. ArfenHouse the Movie is basically a spoof of the game, which in itself parodies everything from Zelda, Final Fantasy, and a whole freaking boatload of silly RPG throwbacks. Then the movie parodies the game. 0_o

Amazingly, the gameís graphics are intentionally bad, and even better, it comes with multiple endings and cut scenes. Oh, and the main ďheroĒ is a piece of toast. If that doesnít make you want to play it, nothing will. I suggest you try both of them, and if you arenít laughing your bowels out, well, then youíve got problems. Big, scary problems.

Andrew "Good kitty" Duff

When a regular person does a limit break, they froth at the mouth and bite themselves.

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