The new guy: Day 1 of my free 14-day trial period
Sadly, Drew Cosner is no longer with us. He moved on last week, may we wish him eternal happiness.
What? No, he's not dead! That isn't how I got here. Really. He works for another site now, sorry for the momentary confusion. My name is Michael Greenhut, I'm a student at Binghamton University and I'll most likely be the new weekend letters froob, along with handling the editorials.

Before I continue I'm obliged to thank Thor for the lovely sack of dung; Salvation Mariott wouldn't take it, so I auctioned it on ebay and now the IRS is after me. I think I've taken enough up enough space here now, so I'd better let you guys and gals have the floor =)

Parasite Eve woes
(mild spoiler)
Help! I'm stuck! Day two in centrol park, there is a key you have to find in the room next to the tele in oder to open the gate so you can find Eve. I saw many walkthoughs they say it's in the upper right closet, but I can't find any, I only find two that only says your inventory is full, (useless). And I looked over the WHOLE room, I still can't find anything! Is it because somthing's wrong with the game?( Everything else is fine) I rented it from a store, could it be the problem? And I was thinking of beating the game on the weeked..... It'll be great if you help me or tell me what's wrong, thanks!


Michael: Try pushing the desk over to find it, it might be in the drawer. If you still can't find it, try the walkthrough on our site if your ethics allow it. Good luck, in any case. But the game shouldn't be broken, unless you've been using it for ultimate frisbee or hot ovaltine drinking games(y'know, I wish they put warning labels about that...I'll miss Saga Frontier. It was a great coaster.)
The Maltese Earring
A winner is you, just kidding but I do have a question. I noticed that in demo's of FF8 Squall has an earring on his left ear. Did square decide to keep it in the actual version in the game because he looks strange with it on.

Michael: Why yes, I believe they did. The earring, if used correctly is a summon for the Wu-tang clan. Once you use it, Squall has to best their mad ebonic skillz in a Parappa-the-rapper style contest and if you win, they come riding to your aid on platinum chocobos at your beck and call. =)
Bring Back Zork!
In defense of Lurking Horror's goodness, I need only say one thing. Infocom. If you're confused, go play Zork, you'll see what I mean. David Raine

Michael: Hey now, what's wrong with Zork? There wasn't much else around of that sort in the 1970's, and it was great for its time. The newer ones I've found are mind-boggling, entertaining and quite hysterical. Text adventures might still compete with binge multimedia sensory treats, if it weren't for people like Drew (no offense there, buddy =)
Final Fantasy 9? Wake up, Crono!
Hey Sages, Since when did FF9 come out? Thor said that Ryan reviewed it! And FF8 never even came over here yet! Those Square programmers really go fast, huh? (if you haven't noticed, I'm kidding, Thor screwed up, but let's all laugh at his mistake! Ha ha)

Michael: For the record, I'll quote Squaresoft's very own review of FF9 when asked:
"Spare me, Please."
Sound like another meteor to you? =)
Questions? Queries? Posers?
Ask Michael
(not Mike)
Now Playing
(not very pubescent for an adult, is he?)
Check the Archives
(nuthin' new fangl'd here)
Nothing just yet, I managed to print everything for this miniscule run(yep, only 4 letters).
Michael's Mirror

And here's my very own Narcissistic little corner... Four letters? Maybe I'm not being given the half of it. From now on be sure to sign them, or don't you want to be immortalized in nice little crystal shards on RPGamer letter columns? You can say to your friends, "Hey, that's me!" and have them answer "Yeah, right."

Darwin Award: My roommate, for attacking a village chicken in Zelda: Ocarina of time and dying as a result. Think you're worthy of one? Send me your little story, and if it's funny enough it'll go right here next time.

- Michael [of] Greenhut
Hi mom! =)

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